Double Trouble: What NOT to do with the Decepticon twins
by Wheeliefan101
Summary: I was just walking home, when BAM! I'm in the middle of a war zone! Next thing I know, I'm stuck with the terrible twins! Living in the Decepticon base! But never fear, reader! I've come to tell you how to (hopefully) survive this tragedy!
1. How to cope with crazy

**Wheeliefan101: *looks around* (whispering) No Autobot–or Decepticon, for that matter–is around. Which means that can't stop me from saying I OWN TRANSFORMERS!**

**Mirage: *turns off cloaking device* Just what do you think you're doing?**

**Wheeliefan101: *scared from seeing Mirage appear out of nowhere* AAAAAAHHHHH! *passes out***

**Mirage: Ha ha, nice try, Wheeliefan101**

**Said author: *doesn't move***

**Mirage: Wheeliefan101?**

**Wheeliefan101: *still not moving***

**Mirage: Okay, you can stop now**

**Wheeliefan101: *doesn't stop not moving***

**Mirage: I'm serious. Just because you don't own Transformers or intend this for offense, doesn't mean you can pretend your dead**

**Wheeliefan101: *stays unmoving***

**Mirage: ...101?**

Chapter 1: How to cope with crazy

**#1 When the Decepticon twins are capturing you, do not try and put up a fight**  
You will lose  
And they will laugh at you  
Which is, BTW, not good for your self esteem T.T

**#2 When you have been captured by the Decepticons, do not run around in circles screaming**  
Some Decepticons will laugh at you  
Others will stare at you like you lost your nut  
The remainder of the group will hit you and tell you to "be quiet"  
Only in more colorful terms  
MUCH more colorful terms

**#3 Do not let the twins tell you that Megatron likes being called Megsy or any names related**  
I actually fell for it  
Megatron is _really_ scary when he's mad  
I'm lucky I was a second faster than his foot  
If you'll excuse me now, I must run for my life  
AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!

**#4 Do not tell the twins you have never pulled a prank**  
The twins were doing something  
And I asked what they were doing  
They told me they were preparing to prank Hook  
Since I was already there (and they probably didn't want me to squeal), they asked if I wanted to help them  
I shrugged and said I had never actually really pulled a prank  
BIG MISTAKE!  
The two just stared at me  
And stared at me  
And stared at me  
And stared at me  
...and stared at me some more  
JUST when I was getting very uncomfortable under their gaze, they exclaimed that we'd have to get started right away!  
That there was so much for them to teach me!  
So they dragged me off to a pranking spree  
I should've run away while I had the chance  
...although it was actually kinda fun  
BUT  
They're not kidding when they say Soundwave is the eyes and the ears of the Decepticons  
Soundwave was more forgiving towards the twins because they have a special sort of relationship (or maybe it's because they're the same species...)  
He wasn't merciful to me  
It's expected from the twins but they wanted to straighten me out when I first did it  
STUPID SOUNDWAVE AND HIS CASSETICONS!

**#5 Do not give Rumble and Frenzy the silent treatment when you are mad at them**  
I did  
One of the biggest mistakes I've ever made  
They used their earthquake thingies on me  
They kept annoying me 'till I finally yelled at them to stop  
They looked at me like I had really hurt them with big sad puppy-dog-optics  
I apologized  
They acted like they didn't believe me  
It took a lot of coaxing and apologizing  
They asked me to do something embarassing to prove I was sorry  
I did it  
Thundercracker had caught the whole thing on tape  
Yeah, I'll be avoiding that guy for a while...

**#6 Do not ask the twins to let you watch a movie with them**  
I was just gonna watch The Iron Giant  
Honest!  
But somehow...  
Someway...  
I ended up watching a show with an axe murderer where the girls were all chainsaws murderers and wearing unappropriate clothing  
The cons came into see what all the screaming was about (the screaming was from yours truly)  
Of course the twins blamed it on me  
Soundwave lectured me  
Mark my words...  
REVENGE. WILL. COME!

**#7 Do not fall asleep in Rumble's lap when watching a movie**  
I was exhausted  
The movie was boring  
Rumble was sitting next to me  
I didn't even know I was asleep in his lap 'till I woke up to the sound of whistles and "ooooooooh!"s  
Now all the 'cons think we're lovers  
Rumble is avoiding me like cosmic rust  
I locked myself in a closet  
I didn't come out 'till I heard that growl...  
Turns out I wasn't alone

**#8 Do not let the twins make you consume energo**n  
I was asleep  
I never saw it coming  
The twins said it was just a prank  
It took ALL the Decepticons to hold me down  
They told me I was screaming that purple polka dots would eat us all and we had to call the fashion police if we wanted to ever slurp pants again  
I finally calmed down when Hook gave me knock out gas  
I still have no memory of that

**#9 When pulling a prank with Rumble and Frenzy, always make sure you have somewhere to hide and someone else to blame**  
Frenzy, Rumble, and I pulled a prank on Skywarp  
I hid in the Wreck room, under the couch for 2 days  
They asked me why I was hiding  
I told them it was because Starscream had pulled the prank and I was scared he would step on me because I'm a witness  
It worked  
Starscream's now in the Brig  
I'm dreading the day he gets out

**#10 When blaming your prank with the twins on someone else, never choose Megatron**  
They surrounded me  
I panicked and blamed the first person that came to mind  
Unfortunatley, that happened to be Megatron  
That was my stupidest mistake ever  
Because:  
A. you can't exactly put your leader in the brig and  
B. Megatron was the one we were pulling the prank on  
I got put in the brig  
I cried my pretty little heart out  
Some of the cons noticed and laughed  
As soon as I got out I began chasing them with Hook's buzzsaw  
I got put back in the brig  
I am VERY mad right now

**Wheeliefan101: X_X**

**Mirage: Ratchet, get in here! She's not waking up!**

**Skywarp: What? What?**

**Mirage: You're not Ratchet!**

**Skywarp: And you're not Jonny Depp!**

**Mirage: ?**

Skywarp: Don't worry, I'm a trusted surgeon. Stand back

**Mirage: *steps back***

**Skywarp: *dumps bucket of water on me***

**Wheeliefan101: Huh?! What?! Who painted the space pirates blue?! Did the Yankees win?!**

**Skywarp and Mirage: What?**

**Wheeliefan101: *sees bucket* YOU! YOU DUMPED WATER ON ME!**

**Skywarp: Watcha gonna do about it?**

**Wheeliefan101: GIMME THAT BUCKET!**

**Skywarp: *holds bucket just too high for the author to reach***

**Wheeliefan101: *jumping* Hey! Not fair!**

**Skywarp: I'll show you what's not fair *picks up author***

**Wheeliefan101: *covers eyes* Oh no! High, very high! Too high!**

**Skywarp: Review or I'm dropping this squishy in a vat of caramel**

**Wheeliefan101: WHAT?! NO! EW! I HATE CARAMEL! REVIEW! PLEASE REVIEW!**


	2. Double dogging daring don't

**Wheeliefan101: Yay! Twackycat and Soniccouples10 saved me from the vat of caramel! Now, Warpie, set me down, they reviewed (and I am so happy they did :3)**

**Skywarp: Not until you do the disclaimer**

**Wheeliefan101: Wha...? What does the disclaimer have to do with-**

**Skywarp: *holds me over caramel* DO IT**

**Wheeliefan101: Oh my gosh! Wheeliefan101doesnotintendthisforoffenseorowntrans formers! Now put me DOWN!**

**Skywarp: As you wish *drops me***

**Wheeliefan101: AAAAAAAHHHHH! **

**Mirage: I'll save you! *shoots vat of caramel, making it disappear***

**Wheeliefan101: *goes splat on floor***

**Mirage: Oops...**

**Wheeliefan101: Wait, why didn't you shoot the vat of caramel BEFORE Skywarp threatened to drop me**

**Mirage: I didn't think of it at the time...**

**Wheeliefan101: ^**

* * *

**_Remember 9/11!_**

* * *

Chapter 2: Double dogging daring don't

**#11 Do not ever let the twins tell you that you have to beg for mercy from Starscream**  
He had stolen my shoes and I wanted them back  
The twins told me to beg for mercy  
I did  
I felt so stupid  
I banged my head repeatedly on a wall  
The cons asked what I was doing  
I told them to leave me alone  
They became worried when I called Skywarp mom and sent me to Hook  
Never again

**#12 Never let the twins dare you to scream the following at Starscream:**  
"I scream! You scream! We all scream it's Starscream!"  
I was playing "truth or dare" and they dared me to do it  
I'm lucky Astrotrain was there  
Not to rescue me  
Nuh-uh  
I hid behind him and he intercepted Starscream's null ray shot for me  
Poor Astrotrain  
I feel sorry for him  
I blame Rumble and Frenzy

**#13 Do not let the twins dare you to shake Megatron's hand with the joybuzzer**  
I was playing "truth or dare" again  
They dared me to  
I said "I want to congratulate you on being such a brilliant leader!" and then stuck out my hand  
He actually shook it  
The look on his face was priceless  
I'm SOOOOOOO glad I managed to dive behind that door in time (although Blitzwing will probably be really mad that his bedroom door is missing)  
Maybe I should just let Megatron cool off for a while...

**#14 Do not let twins dare you into calling Hook "Captain Hook**"  
I was playing "truth or dare" (again)  
They dared me to do it (again)  
The look on his face was priceless XD  
Unfortunatley he actually threw a HOOK at me  
It was SO worth it

**#15 Do not let the twins dare you to go into Starscream's room**  
I was-  
You know what?  
Just don't even play "truth or dare" with the twins  
You'll be happy that you didn't

**#16 When Rumble and Frenzy ask you a question, do not give them a deep glare, smirk, and then in your best Starscream imitation, ask, "What makes you think it's [insert your name]?"**  
The twins ran off  
I forgot how loud they could scream  
I had to convince the twins a million times it was just a prank  
After they stopped they throwing things at me  
They only stopped throwing things at me because they ran out of things to throw  
A lot of the 'cons still stare at me weirdly  
It was just a joke!

**#17 When any of the Cons wake up, do not yell "IT'S ALIVE!"**  
You see, I noticed that the transformers don't sleep a lot  
And they made fun of me for having to sleep so much  
I got sick of it  
Thus, revenge took hold and next thing you know, I'm quoting Frankestien!  
It was funny for a while  
But then I did it to Thundercracker  
He pulled out the video  
All the cons that laughed at me I chased around with Hook's blowtorch  
I got sent to the brig again  
I wrote some very mean things about Thundercracker on those walls

**#18 When in battle, and you see the Autobots, do not yell and scream, waving your arms in hope that they will rescue you**  
I was sure they would rescue me  
Laser-pest noticed and alerted Soundwave  
He ejected Rumble and Frenzy  
They held me down, and then sat on me  
I have never been so humiliated in my entire life  
I was almost positive Sideswipe laughed at me  
Sunstreaker might've too  
I _really_ don't like Transformer twins

**#19 Never leave your diary/journal where Rumble and Frenzy can find it**  
I thought I had hid it in a place where no one would find out  
Imagine my surprise-and _embarrassment_-when _my_ diary was read over the Intercom for EVERYONE to hear  
I had to wrestle it away from Frenzy  
I then locked myself in my room and hid under the bed  
Now no one will EVER find it  
…I hope

**#20 If you think because you have been captured by the Decepticons, that means you do not have to go to school, you are sorely mistaken**  
I told Rumble and Frenzy there was one good thing about being captured  
I didn't have to go to school  
As soon as I told them how much I didn't like school, they told Soundwave, who made me go  
D;  
Life is so unfair

**Skywarp: *in girly apron* Hey, 101, I had an idea on how to get more reviewers**

**Wheeliefan101: How...? *asking more about apron than reviewers***

**Skywarp: Instead of ****_threatening _****them, I'll ****_give them something_****. Which is why I made** **these cookies**

**Wheeliefan101: Skywarp, ****_you _****made those cookies. That is still considered threatening them**

**Skywarp: WHY YOU LITTLE- *tries to grab 101***

**Wheeliefan101: *runs away* AH! MAD BAKER! MAD BAKER! RUN FOR YOUR SALTY CAHSEWS! BRING THE CHEESE! Oh, and please R&R, too. **

**Skywarp: GET BACK HERE!**

**Wheeliefan101: AHHHHHHHH!**


	3. Fighting, school, and other messes

**Wheeliefan101: *gasp* What's this?! ****_Another _****update? Why, yes it is! Basically because I have nothing better to do...**

**Skywarp: Wow, you really have no life**

**Wheeliefan101: Wha-?! Yes, I do!**

**Skywarp: Really?**

**Wheeliefan101: Well, I-you see, I have to-okay, so maybe not**

**But anyway, I see favs, follows, and reviews popping up everywhere! :D I is so happy! Oh, wait...this brings me to a certain subject. One of you left a review with a suggestion, and, I'm sad to say...*deep breath*...I can't take any suggestions**

**Skywarp: *gasp* What?!**

**Wheeliefan101: *buries head in hands in shame* I know, I know, I'm sorry DX**

**Skywarp: Bad squishy! Bad! *points* Go to the Corner of Shame!**

**Wheeliefan101: T.T *goes to Corner of Shame***

**Skywarp: Ah, now we just have to disclaim and-*looks around* Oh, wait...I sent the author to the corner of shame...Gues I have to do it**

**The bad squishy does not intend this for offense or own transformers. Or a dog**

Chapter 3: Fighting, school, and other messes

**#21 Do not attempt to tell an adult at school the Cons have captured you**  
Our parents have told us to go to adults when we have been bullied  
The Cons have done some SERIOUS bullying to me (that's right, Thundercracker, I'm looking at you!)  
I told my teacher  
Laserbeak flew through the window and started shooting at the teach  
Poor person  
They ran out screaming  
We've had a substitute ever since  
I don't think we'll see that teacher again for a long, long time  
Turns out Rumble and Frenzy told Laserbeak to watch me in case I tried to pull something  
Why don't those guys trust me? );

**#22 Arguing about something sensible with Rumble and Frenzy is futile**  
They wanted me to carry Laserbeak in my backpack at school in case I tried anything or any Autobots showed up  
That wouldn't be TOO bad if I didn't go to P.E.  
…and I had to dress out  
They didn't get what the big deal was  
I tried to explain to them that Laserbeak was a boy and I was a girl  
They STILL didn't understand  
I eventually ended up with him in my backpack  
If you come out of there while I'm dressing out, Laserbeak, I will NOT hesitate to drop-kick you out the nearest window!

**#23 Do not ask Rumble and Frenzy how Decepticons get their symbols**  
I made the mistake of asking Rumble how they did  
Frenzy offered to show me  
I accepted  
I didn't know he was actually gonna DO IT on me  
It hurt  
A lot  
Especially since my skin is not metal  
Now I have a Decepticon symbol burned onto my arm

It's gonna take forever for that to heal

**#24 When there is a button that says "do not push", it is probably there for a reason**  
_Probably_  
I was too curious  
Rumble and Frenzy warned me not to do it  
I did it anyway  
The whole base flooded with water  
Luckily, being a human, I floated to the top of the ocean  
Unfortunately I'm stuck there because I can't swim  
Maybe a boat'll come and rescue me  
*sigh* And maybe purple cows'll fly

**#25 When pranking Rumble and Frenzy, do some of the older tricks, those are the ones they least expect**  
I gave Rumble and Frenzy a pat on the back for their latest scheme  
Little did they know I had put a 'kick me' sign on them  
The cons had a field day  
Oh sweet revenge!

**#26 Do not attempt Jet Judo on any of the Seekers**  
So, I heard Rumble and Frenzy talking about the time Sideswipe and Sunstreaker did Jet Judo  
Anyway, I kinda got an idea...  
I decided to try it on Thundercracker and Skywarp  
You shoulda seen the look on their faces XD  
But, unfortunately, you should've also seen the look on _my_ face as I plunged head first to the ground 0o0  
And if you had seen the look on _Hook's_ face when he heard about why I was in the med-bay D:{  
Let's just say I have never been so terrified of a doctor in my life  
Hook was very mad  
So was Megatron  
So was Thundercracker and Skywarp  
So was-well, basically EVERYONE was mad at me  
I blame the twins for telling me about Jet Judo

**#27 Do not make a joke that you have a boyfriend when you really do not**  
It was a joke  
I told Rumble and Frenzy that I had a boyfriend  
They asked who it was  
I came up with a random kid from school  
Later we found out that guy was 'no longer with us'  
Poor Pete  
He's in a better place  
He moved to a private school  
I thought they had done it because they were jealous  
Then I heard Astrotrain talking about how they did it because they didn't want the boy to tell the police who would tell the autobots  
D*:  
I'M NOT EVEN OLD ENOUGH TO HAVE A BOYFRIEND!  
IT WAS A JOKE!

**#28 Do not let the twins and I "fight it out"**  
_Soundwave_  
And here I thought you were supposed to be the mature adult!  
You seriously couldn't think of any better solution then for us to fight it out?!  
Anyway...  
The twins and I got an argument about...toothpaste (long story)  
It eventually ended up with us whining to Soundwave  
Unfortunately, Soundwave told us to work it out ourselves  
Which meant we had to fight  
I, having lived with multiple siblings, do not back down from a fight easily  
But still, they were close to the same size of me!  
I was positive I could beat them!  
But I forgot two things  
One: They are metal  
Two: There are two of them  
I got BUUUUUUUUURNED  
Needless to say, I ended up in the med bay  
For a VERY long time

**#29 Do not try and hack into frenzy's CPU**  
He knew something VERY embarassing about me  
I wasn't going to lose my dignity to a red and black casseti-cuckoo  
I decided to hack into his CPU  
It was just like a big computer, right?  
Wrong  
I don't know why I tried  
Sometimes I can't even get into my e-mail account  
I still made it pretty far  
But...  
Unfortunately...  
Rumble noticed and alerted Soundwave  
I got put in the brig  
Frenzy got a "virus"  
Who knew 'cons could get sick?

**#30 Do not introduce Rumble and Frenzy to "Nyan Cat"**  
It was just for fun!  
Just to see how they would react!  
Unfortunately...  
They decided to try it on Ravage  
Let's just say, Ravage is more of a Tac Nayn, than a Nyan Cat

**Wheeliefan101: I is back again, but I is wearing the Cone of Shame *points to Cone of Shame on head* I just wanted to say, if you find any mistakes, please tell me so I can fix them. I don't want to wear this stupid cone again *scratches* It's itchy**

**I know I has been bad squishy...but review anyway?**


	4. Epic mistakes

**Wheeliefan101: I'm BAAAAAAACK!**

**Skywarp: Well, duh, you posted a new chapter**

**Wheeliefan101: :( Don't ruin the moment! Anyway, I just want to say-**

**Elite Guard: THIS IS THE ELITE GUARD! PUT YOUR SERVOS IN THE AIR!**

**Skywarp and Wheeliefan101: *raise hands/servos in the air* **

**Wheeliefan101: I don't own transformers and don't intend this for offense. Omygosh, are you happy? I cannot get out fast enough for you guys can I? D:**

**Skywarp: No. No you can't**

**Elite Guard: WE HAVE REASON TO BELIEVE YOU ARE HIDING A DECEPTICON!**

**Wheeliefan101: *looks at Skywarp* Lol, Decepticon? What Decepticon?**

**Elite Guard: GRAB HIM!**

**Wheeliefan101: SKYWARP! RUN!**

**Elite Guard: *grab Skywarp***

**Wheeliefan101: WARPIE! NOOOO!**

**Elite Guard: You're coming with us!**

**Wheeliefan101: WHAT?! NO! YOU'LL NEVER TAKE ME ALIVE! YOU'LL NEVER-**

_~We are experiencing technical difficulties. Please enjoy the story~  
_

Chapter 4: Epic mistakes

**#31 Do not leave your homework out where the terror twins can get it**  
I was working on my homework, but then Soundwave called me so I left it there  
EPIC MISTAKE!  
The Trepidazione (Italian word for trepidation) Twins must've been loose  
But when I came back, they were just playing by themselves, like good little mechs  
I thought nothing of it and put my homework in my backpack without looking at it  
EPICER MISTAKE!  
And the next day, I turned it in  
I got a F-  
Somehow, the teacher didn't like scribbles and cuss words written all over her students homework  
I then got sent to the princables office  
Apparently, he doesn't believe "The Twins got a hold of it"  
I was telling the truth!  
But I still got detention and Friday school for the rest of the semester

I am not happy

**#32 Do not comment about Rumble and Frenzy's heigh**t  
It is a very touchy subject  
Well, I was mad  
We were in a fight (a verbal fight)  
And we were insulting each other  
So I came up with this really good one  
I said, "You two are so short!"  
To which they replied, "You're shorter than us!"  
And I told them (here's where the genius part comes in), "Yeah, well at least I'll grow! You two'll stay short forever!"  
They were none too happy about that answer  
Soundwave found me superglued to the ceiling  
Covered in pink paint  
And sparkles  
And feathers  
And a "punch me, I'm stupid" sign  
I've never commented about their height since

**#33 Do not ask how sparklings are formed**  
Curiosity killed the cat  
I should've known  
But I had two things going for me:  
1. I'm not a cat  
2. The cat probably just wasn't being very careful  
So I asked  
I was the cat T.T  
After only 30 seconds of hearing it, I ran out, covering my ears and screaming, "~La la la la la la! I can't hear you! La la la la la la!~"  
*shudders*

**#34 Do not, under any circumstances, ask Soundwave to remove his mask if you value any sanity in your mind**  
I was curious  
So I accidentaly said it out loud near the twins  
Then they told Soundwave  
Who showed me  
And I ran screaming out of there looking for something to wash my mind with  
It was _not_ a pretty sight  
*shudders*  
I still have nightmares

**#35 Do not introduce any of the Cons to jello**  
I was getting really sick and tired of them calling me "squishy"  
So I said, "Oh yeah?! Well there's something more squishy than me!"  
They didn't believe me  
So I SHOWED them jello  
They all glitched  
Hook came in and asked what had happened  
I told him jello had happened  
Then procceded to show him what jello was  
He glitched too  
So I just ran and hid, waiting for them to wake up  
What's wrong with jello?

**#36 Do not play a prank on Skywarp**  
The Twins and I had come up with a REAL good one  
When he entered his room, tons of boots covered in paint fell on him  
And the 'Dora the Explorer' theme song came on  
Not to mention all the monkeys that had conviently found their way into his room...  
Oh my gosh, his face was one of the most hilarious things I've seen XD  
Unfortunatley, payback hurts  
Skywarp 'warped' from behind us and yelled "BOO!"  
We ran screaming away like sissies  
That day, I lost my dignity to a purple teleporter

**#37 Do not lock yourself in your closet**  
So  
I locked myself in my closet 'cause I was feeling emotinal and wanted peace (and because I had accidently set fire to Motormaster's toaster and was afraid he was gonna come after me)  
But then I heard a growl  
WHY DOES RAVAGE LIKE MY CLOSET SO MUCH?!  
Anyway, I screamed and tried to open the door  
I totally freaked out when it wouldn't open  
I finally beat the door down  
Shows what happens when you add me, Ravage, no way to get out, and a closet

**#38 Do not paint a Con to look like a zombie, then procced to throw peas at him**  
I painted Scrapper to look like a zombie from the video game "Plants vs. Zombies"  
When he woke up I screamed "ZOMBIE!" and began throwning peas at him  
I also had sunflowers behind me  
And I made a wall of walnuts to keep him out  
The cherry bombs and exploding jalapenos were real fun  
I even managed to get frozen peas in  
But Megatron was not too happy  
Neither were any of the other 'cons (but Rumble and Frenzy found it funny)  
They're aparently not P.V.Z. fans  
Some people have no taste

**#39 When the Insecticons come to visit, do not shriek "Bug!" and then hit them with a giant fly swatter**  
Rumble and Frenzy told me that they thought it was weird that the Insecticons turned into bugs  
And the Insecticons just "happened" to visit that day  
Me, being me, shrieked "BUG!" and pointed to Shrapnel  
I then procceded to smack all of them with a giant flyswatter  
The 'cons _still_ don't know how I got that  
Ya know what they say,  
"What they don't know, won't hurt 'em"

**#40 If you have recently made the Insecticons mad at you, avoid them at all costs**  
I walked into my room  
I heard "Hello, Tammi (ammi) (ammi)"  
Three Insecticons were in my room  
To put it simply, my face was like this:  
0_0!  
Luckily, the 'cons came when they heard screaming  
Those Insecticons can be down right scary when they want to be!

**Wheeliefan101: *in Stockades* *playing Harmonica***

**Random person: Would you turn that *BLEEP*ing music off?!**

**Wheeliefan101: *frowns then turns off radio which was playing harmonica* *sigh* That's right folks I'm a jailbird. Stuck in the Stockades. i may be here a while (it takes some time to dig an escape hole) so just sit tight**

**R&R**


	5. Unforgetable fouls

**Wheeliefan101: Hey, guess what**

**Autobot guard: Hmph**

**Wheeliefan101: I don't own transformers or intend this for offense**

**Autobot guard: Hmph**

**Wheeliefan101: OH MY GOSH IT'S ROSANNA!**

**Autobot guard: What?! Where?! *looks back to cell* There's no Ros-**

**Cell: *empty***

**Autobot guard: Oh slag**

**Wheeliefan101: *being chased by guards* I'm ****_freeeeeeeeeeeeeee!_**

Chapter 5: Unforgetable fouls

**#41 Do not videotape the Cons and put them to the MLP theme song**  
Heh heh  
It was hilarious  
Their computer put up an alert (my part)  
They pulled it up  
Showed them with the MLP theme song  
Here's a little sneak peek of what I did:  
Megatron-Twilight  
Starscream-Spike  
Thundercracker-Rainbow dash  
Soundwave-Fluttershy  
Hook-Rarity (yeah, I don't really know where I got that, either...)  
Frenzy-Applejack  
Rumble-Pinkie Pie  
Bruticus-Princess Celestia  
Turns out the cons are not bronies  
I was in the brig for five weeks  
FIVE. STINKING. WEEKS!

**#42 Do not let the twins go in any human bathrooms**  
I walked into my room  
Next thing I know, two screamin' blurs run out  
Turns out they went into my bathroom  
Also turns out they found somethings they didn't want to

Thank you disgusting human nature!  
You have saved (some of) my privacy

**#43 Do not call the twins outdated because they turn into cassette tapes**  
I told them  
They then proceeded to show me how up-to-date they were  
Ug  
The song "Party Rock Anthem" may be stuck in my head permanently  
I learned from my mistake  
Now I call them too modern (heh heh)

**#44 Never call Soundwave an "uncharismatic boar"**  
I was mad  
So I took it out on Soundwave  
"LEAVE ME ALONE, YOU UNCRASIMATIC BOAR!"  
Rumble and Frenzy did not take that too well  
They ganged up on me and...  
Well  
Let's just I'm now always nice to Soundwave when the twins are around

**#45 Do not let Rumble and Frenzy watch "White Fang"**  
After years and years of waiting, it finally arrived  
I planned to watch a marathon of it, all day long  
But the trouble twins came in  
And ask what I was watching  
I told them "White Fang"  
They watched it with me  
When it ended, they went off to do something else  
The next day started with a bang  
LITERALLY  
I woke up to a bang sound  
When I ran out, a husky dog was running around  
R 'n' F had apparently bought *coughstolecough* it  
And tried to teach it tricks like White Fang could do  
Didn't end too well  
We finally had to give it back  
Poor pup's probably traumatized for life

**#46 Do not mess with any 'cons when they're in their alt. mode**  
I was bored  
Hook was gone off on an "important" mission  
And the twins were stuck in their cassette modes  
They were also unconscious because Hook was doin' repairs on them  
Curiosity got the better of me  
I messed with the cassettes  
Then the black tape sorta thingy came out  
I was all like "OoO! Slag! I can fix this!"  
I apparently couldn't  
And then they woke up  
Ever had the black tape sorta thingy messed with when you're a cassette?  
Well it apparently hurts  
A LOT  
Payback's gonna pack a punch .

**#47 Do not play poker with the twins**  
We weren't playing _real_ poker  
Money was useless to them and I have no axel grease  
We were just playing for fun  
But I should've remembered fun for Rumble and Frenzy usually means trouble for someone else  
This time, me  
I _know_ they were cheating  
It's astronomically impossible to win THAT many times!  
I think it was the "bystanders"  
Ravage, Laserbeak, and Buzzsaw watched the game  
I think a little birdy told R 'n' F what my cards were  
Stop denying it! I know you did it!

**#48 If it is not bothering anyone, do not bother it**  
Soundwave actually allowed the Cassetticons and me outside (hallelajuh!)  
But the twins just HAD to mess it up for us  
They kept poking some random girl  
She finally got sick of it  
Soundwave, the rest of the Cassettesicons, and I were relaxing  
Then we saw an angry mob chasing after Rumble and Frenzy  
Turns out she had friends  
Lots and lots of friends!

**#49 Following the rule above, do not agitate an angry mob**  
Rumble and Frenzy ran for us  
So the angry mob_ also_ ran for us  
The cassettes and I did what any other civilized being would do  
We hid behind Soundwave  
Soundwave tried to calm them down  
"Enraged mass of humans: do not advance. Suggestion: Follow-"  
*K-RASH*  
That was the sound of the angry mob knocking Soundwave over  
"Proposition: escape. Cause: Enraged mass of humans advancing towards targets ready to offline us in violent manner."  
We didn't need to be told twice  
We hightailed it out of there  
Never have I known that cassettes and a cassette player could run so fast

**#50 No shaking up energon**  
I thought it would be just like a soda!  
Frenzy gave me a soda  
I opened it  
It exploded all it's wet fluid over me  
So I decided to get payback  
I shook up some energon,  
Gave it to Frenzy,  
…did you know shaken up energon is highly explosive?  
Yeah, you can imagine how that went  
.

**Wheeliefan101: *just released Skywarp and avoided guards* *pant pant* I think we lost them**

**Skywarp: I think you're right**

**Wheeliefan101: Oh hey look! Wasp! He's not a guard, right?**

**Skywarp: Nope**

**Wheeliefan101: *taps on Wasp* Hey, Wasp, could you-**

**Wasp: ~Do you like waffles?~**

**Jettwins: ~Yes we like waffles!~**

**Wheeliefan101: What the...? O_O**

**Wasp: ~Do you like pancakes?~**

**Jettwins: ~Yes we like panckes!~**

**Wheeliefan101: *grabs Skywarp***

**Wasp: ~Do you like french toast?~**

**Jettwins: ~Yes we like french toast!~**

**Wheeliefan101: Skywarp...I'm scared...**

**R&R before they sing another verse!**


	6. Uh, whoops?

**Wheeliefan101: The great authoress has returned!**

**Skywarp: What great authoress? *looks around* Where?**

**Wheeliefan101: Ha ha, very funny**

**Skywarp: No, really, where?**

**Wheeliefan101: Oh, I get it. You want me to disclaim. Fine. I don't own transformers or intend this for offense. Happy?**

**Skyarp: Dude, I'm serious**

**Wheeliefan101: ^ Roll film...**

Chapter 6: Uh, whoops?

**#51 When Starscream talks about becoming leader of the Decepticons, it is not mutiny, it's just Starscream being Starscream**  
I was walking along  
When I passed by Starscream's room  
And heard him talking about being the new leader of the Decepticons  
My mind put two and five together and got E=f-150  
In other words, I thought Starscream was getting ready to attempt mutiny  
So I found the first people I could  
Which was Rumble and Frenzy  
I told them about his plan for mutiny  
To which they told Megatron about  
And he chewed Starscream out  
But got really IRRITATED when he found out what Starscream had REALLY been doing  
Have no more time to talk,  
Got a mad Megatron and Starscream on my tail!

**#52 No snowball fights**  
It had been _snowing _last night!  
HALLELAJUH!  
And Soundwave took us outside!  
That fluffy white stuff was _EVERYWHERE_!  
And the bigger 'cons kept slipping on it!  
It was all a lot of fun  
Well, until Rumble and Frenzy threw a snowball at me  
So I, of course, had to throw one back  
They threw _two_ back  
It then became all out war  
We eventually ended up buried alive in our snowballs  
Took the Construcitons five _hours_ to dig us out  
Coldest five hours of my life

**#53 No eating snowflakes**  
There was still snow!  
So Soundwave took us outside as long as we promised to behave  
When we got out there it started _snowing_!  
_Snowing_, I say, _snowing_!  
Rumble, being the 'con he was, tried to EAT the snowflakes

Did you know snowflakes were _poisinous_ to Decepticons?  
Frenzy and I figured as much when Rumble started choking  
…and turned green  
…then passed out  
We had to rush him to the Emergency Room  
Don't worry  
He lived  
But now he has a big phobia of snowflakes

**#54 No trying to cook flapjacks**  
I was _really_ hungry  
So hungry I got DESPERATE  
I decided to _cook_ for myself (told ya I was desperate)  
I chose the food you people know as flapjacks  
They didn't start out too bad  
But when they stuck to the celieng...  
…and started trying to kill OTHER Cybertronians *coughRumbleFrenzycough*  
I knew we may have had a problem  
So after getting a crowbar and flamethrower (and a fire extingusher in case I burned myself and/or other things/Decepticons)  
I set off to destroy the deadly flapjacks  
I got them all  
I think...(that one crawling behind you makes me supscious)

**#55 No playing golf inside**  
We were bored  
So I suggested golf  
But we couldn't go outside  
Soundwave wouldn't let us  
Because of the mob  
And the snowball fight  
Let's not forget the almost posining  
So we comprimised  
Rumble and Frenzy were beating me  
BADLY  
I got so frustrated that I putted the ball _really_ hard  
…it landed in Megatron's optic  
So we hightailed it outta there  
P.S. I was never here

**#56 If I yell threats at you and I'm angry, I will most likely try to carry out those threats**  
Rumble and Frenzy messed up my art project  
Which I had been working _TWO YEARS_ on  
So I yelled at them, "I'M GONNA STAPLE YOUR PEDES TO YOUR HELM AND SUPERGLUE YOUR OPTICS TO EACH OTHER!"  
The twins waved me off  
Until I came at them with a staple gun and super glue  
The only thing stopping me was Soundwave holding me about 900 feet in the air  
That and reason the twins had all the other Cassetticons protecting their fellow ally (Ravage scares me...)

**#57 No using defibrillators unless someone really needs it**  
I got this REALLY big papercut  
And I am _very_ queasy around blood  
I never made it to Hook  
Rumble and Frenzy decided to take immediate action  
They made homehade defirbrillators (shock thingies used in hospitals)  
"Clear!"  
[Insert shocking sound]  
I just passed out!  
Not a heart attack!  
Ever been electrocuted?  
NOT FUN  
They had to drag me-whimpering and rocking back and forth-to Hook  
He was _not_ happy with the twins  
:D HAHAHAHA!

**#58 No using M&Ms to color your milk**  
I was drinking milk and eating M&Ms  
It was all fine and dandy until Frenzy bumped me  
And made me accidently drop my M&Ms into my milk  
I got very mad  
I wasn't about to stick my hand in there and blindly fish around for it so I started swishing my milk around, trying to see where it had gone  
Then the milk started turning the color of the M&M  
So we got an idea  
We dumped enough blue M&Ms in there to make it look like energon  
It was a lot of fun  
Well, until I accidently spilled my milk/fake energon on the twins  
Hook just happened to pass by  
And he thought the twins were bleeding  
He rushed them to the med-bay  
Very akward explaining it was just M&M colored milk  
Hook was not too happy  
Uh, whoops? ^_^'

**#59 No more fist fights**  
R 'n' F and me were rough housing  
Frenzy hit me in the face  
The twins stopped when they noticed my mouth was bleeding  
…and that I spit out a tooth  
They knocked that sucker right out of my mouth  
Don't worry  
I lived  
But the twins find it creepy that I have a gap in my mouth

**#60 No swallowing an object unless you know it's not poisonous**  
Rumble and Frenzy had this object (to which I will not metion to keep my life)  
They were keeping it from me  
Like _REALLY_ hiding it from me  
So I had to steal it from them  
Which lead to a chase  
They eventually cornered me  
So I did the single most stupidest thing I could ever have done  
I swallowed it  
The twins got mad at me  
Partly because they lost their object and partly because I had swallowed somthing that was most likely not non-toxic  
I later felt the effects  
_Ohhhhhh_ my poor stomach!  
Hook had to take me to the ICU  
I am _still_ there  
"Tammi, you need to have surdgery."  
WHAT?!

**Wheeliefan101: Oh my gosh! :0 How many of you were expecting ****_that_****?**

**Skywarp: You could see it from a mile away**

**Wheeliefan101: Excuse me but did I ask you?**

**Skywarp: Yes**

**Wheeliefan101: No I didn't, now go blow up a power plant or something**

**Tell me whatcha think, readers! :D**

**Reviews make cookie dough, cookie dough make energon cookies**

**Here, have cookie :3**


	7. TWIN TAKEOVER!

Chapter 7: TWIN TAKEOVER!  
Chapter 7: TWIN TAKEOVER!

Rumble: Wazzup boys and girls?  
Frenzy: Hey everybody. We gonna be doin' the rules  
Rumble: Tammi is still in the ICU  
Frenzy: We told her not ta swallow it  
Rumble: Shame  
Frenzy: Learn the lesson, kiddies: if we tell you not ta do something, don't do it  
Rumble: Enough talkin'! Let's get crackin'

**#61 No constantly annoying Hook**  
Rumble: We kept checking up on Tammi  
Frenzy: She hadn't changed. Like at all  
Rumble: The doc eventually kicked us out  
Frenzy: So we kept bugging him about her condition  
Rumble: He eventually lost it  
Frenzy: And threw multiple _SHARP_ objects at us  
Rumble: All the while yelling some things Soundwave wouldn't let us repeat  
Frenzy: Worst thing is, when a medic injures you, there ain't nobody to help patch you up

**#62 Just because we're short, that does not mean we're not your superiors**  
Frenzy: We ARE your superiors  
Rumble: Yeah, get that through your thick processors, new recruits!  
Frenzy: I'm tired of new recruits asking us where the superiors are...  
Rumble: Us saying 'We're the superiors'...  
Frenzy: And them askin' 'No, seriously'  
Rumble: It's gettin' old  
Frenzy: If all you newbies don't stop, we're gonna put some serious hurt on ya!

**#63 Energon and electronics do not**  
Rumble: Hook made us help him with one of his projects  
Frenzy: We was drinkin' energon  
Rumble: …and we accidently spilled some energon onta one o' his electronic thingies  
Frenzy: How was we supposed ta know it would come ta life?  
Rumble: Well, it did  
Frenzy: And we had ta kill it  
Rumble: Nasty little thing

**#64 No ejecting when Soundwave is flying**  
Frenzy: We was getting bored in Soundwave's tape deck  
Rumble: And it was getting cramped  
Frenzy: We also wanted ta see what was goin' on outside  
Rumble: So we...ejected  
Frenzy: Although Soundwave hadn't told us too...  
Rumble: And we basically fell  
Frenzy: About 265, 973, 017, 023 miles down  
Rumble: ...flat on our faces  
Me: *holds up sign that says "Hahahahaha!"*  
Frenzy: Stop laughing, it ain't funny!

**#65 You are not a poet**  
Rumble: We searched through some of Tammi's things in her backpack  
Frenzy: Ta see what the teachs were teaching this generation  
Me: *holds up sign that says "Lies! D:"  
Rumble: Pay no attetion ta the patient in the background  
Frenzy: Anyway, we found out that Tammi was doing a thing called "poetry"  
Rumble: So we decided ta try it out  
Frenzy: Which meant we went around, talking in rhyme  
Rumble: The other 'cons got annoyed  
Frenzy: And shot at us  
Rumble: Multiple times  
Frenzy: Some people have no taste

**#66 No messing with human officials**  
Frenzy: Me and Rumble were having some fun...  
Rumble: ...messing around with the human officals  
Frenzy: But they called back up  
Rumble: Who knew those squishies had _tanks_?  
Frenzy: Just dumb luck that one of the tanks happened ta be Warpath

**#67 No using lotion as a prank item**  
Rumble: Tammi asked us ta bring her homework ta her because Hook wouldn't let her leave the med-bay  
Frenzy: While we were searching through her backpack, we found a thing called "lotion"  
Rumble: We found out it was very slippery  
Frenzy: So we got an idea for a prank  
Rumble: We spread that stuff all along the med-bay floor  
Frenzy: All the patients Hook had kept getting ANOTHER appointment  
Rumble: Hook even had ta get repaired  
Frenzy: But it all turned sour when Megs slipped  
Rumble: …and fell on us  
Frenzy: No comment

**#68 Teachers are scary**  
Frenzy: We were searching for energy sources  
Rumble: And invaded a school  
Frenzy: Which just happened ta be Tammi's school  
Rumble: When she said one of her teachs were scary, she was right  
Frenzy: That female squishy was _SCARY_!  
Rumble: You say anything about this, we'll hunt you DOWN (we know where ya live)

**#69 Jet packs are a bad idea**  
Rumble: Skywarp gave us the idea  
Frenzy: The constructions helped build it  
Rumble: Blame _them_  
Frenzy: You kiddies don't wanna know what happened  
Rumble: Let's just say it ended with an explosion  
Frenzy: A BIG explosion

**#70 No changing the washracks' water to different colors**  
Frenzy: It was a simple enough job  
Rumble: And the results were beautiful  
Frenzy: Never knew a fellow 'con could scream so loud  
Rumble: And how was we supposed ta know it would change their paint jobs?  
Frenzy: Lemme tell ya, rainbow colored 'cons are some of the funniest things I've ever seen  
Rumble: But the plan backfired on us  
Frenzy: _We_ also had ta use the washracks  
Rumble: Not one of our better pranks...


	8. I'm BAAAAAAAAACK!

**Wheeliefan101: I have returned with another chapter!**

**Sentinel: Don't you have something to disclaim?**

**Wheeliefan101: *looks SP up and down* What are ****_you _****doing here and where is Skywarp?**

**Sentinel: In the brig**

**Wheeliefan101: Oh...bummer...=/**

**Sentinel: I'm here to babysit you**

**Wheeliefan101: ****_What_****? Ex-cuse me but I don't NEED a babysitter!**

**Sentinel: Then why haven't you disclaimed?**

**Wheeliefan101: *crosses arm* I don't wanna and you can't make me**

**Sentinel: *holds up shield and giant sword***

**Wheeliefan101: Meep! 0_0 Okay...maybe you can...I don't own Tformers and I don't intend this for offense...meanie...I wish you had stayed as a head**

**Sentinel: EXCUSE ME?! *chases 101 with shield* GET BACK HERE!**

**Wheeliefan101: Catch me if you can, slowpoke-i-mus Prime! Roll film!**

Chapter 8: I'm BAAAAAAAAACK!

Rumble: Sup fans?  
Frenzy: We're back and here to set some ground rules  
Me: Guys?  
Both: What?  
Me: I'm better now  
Rumble: So?  
Me: So I can do the rules  
Frenzy: Your point?  
Me: My point is, GET OFF THE COMPUTER! *shoves twins off the computer*

**#71 No pulling a real alarm unless there's a real emergency**  
I was so bored  
All the 'cons were giving me the silent treatment  
Even Rumble and Frenzy were ignoring me  
Which is really surprising since they usually LOVE annoying me  
It was REALLY ANNOYING  
So I decided it was high time for a little revenge  
They really shouldn't put that fire alarm in plain sight  
The Decepticons freaked out  
They had to go outside to avoid the fire  
But outside...  
...was the ocean  
Downside to having a base underwater  
The 'cons were all running around in a frenzy (there is no pun intended)  
...until they saw me rolling on the floor laughing  
...and realized I had just pulled a prank on them  
Ever been chased all around base with a bunch of giant alien robots hot on your tail?  
Another downside to an underwater base

**#72 Watch your language**  
We had a test subject protoform  
Megatron put Soundwave in charge of it  
Who gave the responsibility to our favorite two tourmentors  
And the lazy buggers forced _me_ to take care of it  
Lucky me -_-  
I was trying to edumicate it, so to speak  
Not going over too well  
Skywarp then passed by  
He accidently tripped over a stray crowbar (don't ask)  
It apparently hurt  
A LOT  
I could tell by the way ol' Warpy was cursing up a storm  
I, as usual, just ignored him, knowing better than to repeat what he yells  
BUT  
The protoform didn't  
When we presented the protoform to Megzy...  
...it repeated what Skywarp had said  
And-  
Well...  
Let's just say we no longer have a protoform

**#73 No more "marco polo"**  
The twins and I thought it would be a good idea  
I mean, it was just us  
And we were close to the same size  
Unfortunately we forgot about one thing:  
The other 'cons  
I nearly got stepped on five times  
Having to keep my eyes shut did not help  
Frenzy once DID get stepped on  
Don't worry  
He lived  
But I did break my arm when Skywarp accidentely (or not so accidently, it's hard to tell when your eyes are closed) kicked me

**#74 If it's not yours, ****_DO NOT TOUCH IT!_**  
Rumble and Frenzy were abandoning me to go to one of their...  
I actually don't know _what_ they were doing  
But they just told me not to follow  
And by told, I mean duct taped me to the wall in a sticky cacoon  
Once I got out of the duct tape trap, I decided to annoy Soundwave  
But when I went to his quarters, he wasn't there  
So I got curious and started snooping  
There was this BIG. BALL. OF. BLACK.  
So of course I had to poke it  
And when it didn't do anything, I left it alone  
…okay  
Maybe I didn't actually leave it alone  
I _may_ have kicked it  
How was I supposed to know it was Ravage?  
It's not like I see Ravage recharging everyday!  
That's like a once in a lifetime experience!  
Like sighting bigfoot dancing on pogo stick in the middle of a snowstorm!  
Anyway, Ravage was not happy at being woken up  
He was pretty steamed  
He also chased me around, trying to either:  
A. Chop me into sushi  
B. Eat me alive  
C. Kill me in some other vicious way  
D. All of the above

**#75 No throwing skittles at passing Decepticons**  
Well, what do they expect?  
Those guys already took away my M&Ms!  
Anyway, I kept throwing Skittles at whoever dared passed me (even though I was hiding so they wouldn't know they were daring to pass me)  
I was even getting a pretty good hit record too  
456,783,020,134 Skittles actually _hit_ the Decepticons (although I had 999,999,999,999 Skittles. I, uh, got hungry and ate one...)  
Until Rumble and Frenzy uleashed their "secret weapon"  
I only remember hearing, "TASTE THE RAINBOW!" before a sea of rainbow Skittles poured down on us (aka me and everybody else in the room)  
Next thing I know, I'm in Hook's med-bay  
…I'll never be able to look at a skittle the same way

**#76 No using medical terms around non-medics**  
"Your abdomenal region is experiencing forceful explusion of it's contents through your oral cavity."  
Nobody can understand you, Hook!  
Nobody but you and your Constructicon buddies!  
You can't tell your paitents that!  
They won't understand you!  
I know I don't!  
Rumble and Frenzy knocked me in the stomach  
So I had to go to Hook  
He then told me what you just read  
Just say it, Hook!  
Say I upchucked!  
_Say it!_

**#77 No having random conversations**  
R 'n' F and me were talking about what jobs we wish we had  
I said I wanted to be a ninja  
Rumble said he wanted to be a ninja-assissin  
The twins then got in a fight about who would make a better ninja-assissin  
Soundwave then came in  
I had to explain to the twins that there was no such thing as a ninja-assissin  
Assissin was just a higher former of ninja  
Like getting a black belt in karate  
Soundwave then sent us to bed, right then, on the spot  
What did we do wrong? D':

**#78 No randomly announcing funny lines**  
"When I die, I want to die like my grandfather who died peacefuly in his sleep. NOT SCREAMING LIKE ALL THE PASSENGERS IN HIS CAR!"  
This was me when Swindle was driving me to school  
To say he was a bad driver was the understatement of the century  
He took car-pooling to a whole new level  
He actually drove into a POOL  
"Genius is 1% inspiration, 99% perspiration. Thus was born deodarent!"  
Me when R, F, 'n' I were pulling a prank  
A very HARD prank  
Which made us sweat like pigs  
Well, me sweat, the twins overheat  
New fangled machines...  
"I'm dying! *falls to the floor* dying...dying...*crumples* dying... goodbye, cruel-ooh! Look! A penny!"  
Skywarp when I accidently hit him with a spoon  
Long story short, it was killer cereal

**#79 Thou shall not speak in ancient tongue**  
For if thee speaketh in ancient tongue, thee shall anger many Decepticons  
Thou also shalt not forget that in addition to angering alien beings, thou shall be pelted with a thousand pop rocks, which feel like flames of a raging fire  
Thee can thank Cybertronian pair, who have strikingly similar structures, Rumblonius and Frenzicus for thy pain  
Escape post haste while thou hast a chance

**#80 No more Hex Bugs**  
I picked one up at a store while shopping for food  
It was an Ant  
I got an idea for a little prank  
I turned it on and released the bug  
The 'cons screamed like a litte sparkling  
Rumble and Frenzy used their earthquake thingies to smash my sweet little bug  
I didn't think they'd kill him!  
Poor Bob T.T

**Wheeliefan101: *in Perceptor's cabinet drawer's* Shh! I'm hiding from you-know-who! Don't forget to R&R! They give me more oppurtnities to throw stuff at SP!**

**Perceptor: *opens drawer* *sees me* ...**

**Wheeliefan101: Um...hi...I like your drawers...comfy...**


	9. Business blunders

**Wheeliefan101: *wearing shirt that says "Hasbro"* I own transformers!**

**Cliffjumper: No you don't**

**Wheeliefan101: But I'm wearing a Hasbro shirt**

**Cliffjumper: That just means Hasbro owns YOU**

**Wheeliefan101: O.O *runs away* NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!**

**Cliffjumper: *points to Author* The maniac doesn't mean this for offense or own transformers**

Chapter 9: Business blunders

**#81 No singing sad songs about the Cons**  
Soundwave wouldn't let me join an afterschool club  
A really AWESOME afterschool club  
Which meant I moped around, before a song formed in my mind  
So of course I sang it  
About half way through the song, Rumble and Frenzy threw a sock at me  
Really, guys?  
A sock?  
Really?

**#82 No more singing the F.U.N. song**  
~F is for friends who do stuff together,  
Rumble: You is for you and me,  
Frenzy: N is for anywhere, any time at all,  
All of us: Down here in the deep blue sea!~  
Me: The best part?  
We really ARE in the deep blue sea!  
MWHAHAHAHAHAHA!  
The Decepticons were getting mopey and pessimistic  
More than they usually were, that is  
So the twins and I decided to try and cheer them up!  
Unfortunately, they didn't like our little prep song  
We could kinda tell by the way we were shot at  
Multiple times  
And almost thrown at the window  
The only reason we WEREN'T thrown out the window was because we don't exactly HAVE any windows

**#83 Rumble and Frenzy, stop switching your paintjobs**  
It's confusing!  
Although I guess that's the whole point...  
I walked up to Rumble and said, "Hi Rumble!"  
"Whaddya mean, Rumble? I'm Frenzy!"  
Then the real Rumble came by  
They both laughed at me  
Poor Soundwave's so confused  
Wait  
Since when do I care about Soundwave?  
Oh yeah  
Because he is the one who keeps the terror twins from destroying us all  
Maybe I should tell him how much I appreciate that  
Nah

**#84 Never mix the following:**  
Tacos  
Marshmellows  
Rumble  
Frenzy  
Jalepanos  
Pink lemonde  
-_- I don't want to talk about it

**#85 No telling me something is impossible**  
I told the cassette brothers I could do anything  
"Whoever said nothing is impossible never tried slamming a revolving door."  
That one made me think  
I bought a revolving door...  
Got the Constructicons to help me take it apart...  
Then, using one of the doors, slammed it  
...into Megatron's face  
And procceded to run for my life  
But still, I did it  
HA!

**#86 No selling lemonade**  
It was an innocent enough business...  
We even had the lemonade homemade!  
Don't worry, I removed all the toxicins  
But Rumble and Frenzy had very _effective_ methods  
_Effective_ and _aggresive_  
"Buy the lemonade before we blast you all the way to Cyberton, ya little punk!"  
Poor kid  
Gave us all his money and ran off crying  
I had to apologize to him  
I then decided we had better close our business before his mom found us (she worked for the army and had a fully functional BAZOOKA)

**#86 No having screaming contests**  
As you may know (or may not know), Frenzy and Rumble can scream at high pitched frequencies  
Believe you me, it can pretty annoying  
And I, being a young female, am able to scream too  
So we decided to have a screaming contest to see who could scream louder and/or higher  
Didn't go over too well  
Scavanger finally threw a car at us and yelled at us to, and I quote, "*BLEEP*ING *BLEEP*ERS HAD BETTER *BLEEP* OUR *BLEEP*ING *BLEEP* BEFORE *BLEEEEEEEEEEP*!"  
Yeah, it wasn't pretty

**#87 No more Uno**  
Rumble, Frenzy, the other Cassetticons, the seekers, Soundwave, and I were playing Uno  
I was getting schooled  
By EVERYBODY  
How did I get beat by Ravage?!  
He doesn't even have hands!  
I eventually got so fed up that I yelled, "This is so FRUSTRATING!"  
I then procceded to throw my cards down  
Well, I _meant_ for them to go down  
Unforunately for me, the fan was on  
So it blew the cards around  
One accidently got lodged in Skywarp's optic  
VERY painful to get out  
Heh heh,  
My bad, Warpie...

**#88 No more frisbees**  
Soundwave had been at a battle  
And he had left me, Rumble and Frenzy behind (the nerve!)  
So we made sure to glare at him when he got back  
But apparently he had picked something up  
A sheet of metal  
But with our crazy imagination, the twins and I turned into a...  
Ta-da!  
Frisbree!  
It was epic  
And we were pretty good (well, R 'n' F were. I couldn't catch it if it put itself in my hands...which it has...and I still haven't caught it...)  
But alas and alack, our fun was not to last  
Rumble threw this killer throw  
I _tried_ to catch it, believe me I did  
But it still got away  
And it hit Bruticus in the optic  
You know Bruticus  
The large guy who is the Combaticons combined?  
Mh-hm  
Yeah, well he's trying to step on us right now  
RUN!

**#89 Exploding pudding balloons are not a good idea**  
Cassetticons...  
How?  
Just, how? (Although I'm mainly blaming the twins)  
Twins: Hey!  
Me: Ha ha  
Anyway,  
_SOMEBOTS_ got a "bright" idea to throw exploding pudding balls at unexpected victims  
Mainly, me and the seekers  
Don't why I was paired up with the seekers  
But still  
Ever had pudding in your hair?  
SO hard to get out  
Especialy when there's exploded balloon parts  
And one time I found a raisin in one of them -_-  
Wait  
*observes _crawling_ raisin*  
O_O  
That's not a raisin

**#90 Chocolate syrup is not meant to be used on the floor**  
*points to Rumble and Frenzy*  
They did it!  
Rumble and Frenzy: *points back to me* She made us!  
Me: *death glare*  
Anyway...  
Ramjet had just brought me back from the store  
And I had just bought a WHOLE lotta chocolate syrup  
Unfortunately, I forgot the most important thing:  
Ice cream  
So I was moping around, wallowing in self pity, when I was struck by an inspiration  
Actually, I was hit by R&F  
They had apparently slipped on the slick floor  
I had a light bulb  
...right before they crashed into me, making me fall down also  
After telling the twins my plan, we set to work  
We pulled an alarm, which meant the 'cons ran out of...wherever they were...and right into a sticky floor covered in chocolate syrup!  
The twins and I were laughing it up (from the saftey of the rafters), watching as the Decepticons trip, slip, and slide  
Unfortunately, Buzz-pest (just doesn't have that nice ring that Laserpest does...) spotted us and ratted us out to Soundwave  
…squealer...  
Anywho, we ended up in the brig and only were allowed to come out to clean up the syrup  
With a toothbrush  
Real smooth, 'Wave, real smooth

**Wheeliefan101: BUUUUUUUURN, SHIRT, BUUUUUUUUUUURN! KILL IT WITH FIRE! *covering "Hasbro" shirt in flames***

**Thundercracker: Uh, what are you doing? .~_.^**

**Wheeliefan101: Isn't it obvious? I'm burning the shirt that says Hasbro owns me *shivers* Oh the horror...**

**Thundercracker: But...where did you get that flamethrower?**

**Wheeliefan101: Oh, from Kre-on Singe/Scorch :D**

**Singe/Scorch: GIVE THAT BACK YOU #^# *$! *begins chasing Wheeliefan101***

**Wheeliefan101: *running away with flamethrower* NO! NEVER! IT'S MINE NOW! ****_MY _****PRECIOUS! GET YOUR OWN! Ooh, don't forget to R&R :3**


	10. Life's a rollercoaster

**Wheeliefan101: *in shark costume, sneaking up on Thundercracker* Dun nun. Dun nun.**

**Thundercracker: .~_.^?**

**Wheeliefan101: Dun nun nun. Dun nun nun nun *gets closer to TC* dununununununDUN DUN DUN! DUN NUN-**

**Thundercracker: *smacks author***

**Wheeliefan101: *falls to the ground, clutching face* Oh my nose!**

**Thundercracker: *vents* 101 doesn't own transformers or intend this for offense. If she did, I'd smack her again...**

**Wheeliefan101: *rolling in agony* OH THE PAAAAAAAAAIN!**

Chapter 10: Life's a rollercoaster

**#91 Amusement parks are not meant for Decepticons**  
Soundwave and the seekers and the Cassetticons and me and...and...well that's everyone, we all went to an amusement park!  
Don't worry, we didn't blow up (a lot of) stuff  
Laserbeak kept getting "little presents" from birds, Ravage kept trying to eat the birds who did...you know...to Laserbeak, and Rumble and Frenzy dragged me onto EVERY ride  
Although we got banned from the merry-go-round  
Something about animal cruelty (the twins used an actual whip on the horses)  
But the real trouble began when R&F wanted to go on the roller coaster  
I, of course, screamed my head off like the little sissy I was  
Meanwhile, the twins...they taught me a new Cybertronian word  
Here, I'll show you  
Cybertronian word: purge tanks  
Human translation: lose your lunch  
Example: Rumble and Frenzy purged their tanks all over me -_-

**#92 When Shockwave comes to visit, run away if you have any value for what little normalcy you may have left**  
So  
Shockwave decided to come to base  
Rumble and Frenzy noticed I was feeling shy around him  
So they introduced me to him  
What they said about me was not too flattering (I do not snore when I sleep!)  
Then Shockwave called me, and I quote, "An intriguing specimen"  
While I just stared at him like "~._^.?"  
When no one was around he kidnapped me and took me to his lab  
OH THE HORRORS I SAW IN THERE!  
He strapped me to a table  
Then he said the scariest thing that still haunts me to this day  
"In here, no one can hear you scream"  
Who invented soundproof rooms? -_-  
When I woke up, I felt bigger  
And taller  
And heavier  
And metalier  
So I caught my reflection in the mirror  
I WAS A GIANT ROBOT TRANSFORMER!  
Although I could still transform into a human  
Well…this shall prove interesting

**#93 Do not try and keep something from Rumble and Frenzy**  
I was trying to hide that I was, like, you know, part CYBERTRONIAN  
I locked myself in my room  
Rumble and Frenzy knew something was up  
I kept a pretty good cover  
But I forgot that they knew how to get into my room  
I never knew the twins could glitch

**#94 Do not play football with the twins**  
Whenever I find out who did that... *makes slitting motion at throat*  
I was just reading a book, minding my own business  
Then BAM!  
Rumble and Frenzy drag me outside to play football  
And I had to play in my human mode  
Since in my robot mode I was bigger than them  
And it wouldn't be "fair"  
Since when do they care about fair?  
Anyway, I played  
I got flattened  
Run over  
And beaten  
Hook thought I was a zombie because of all my injuries and that I was still walking  
He freaked out  
Who knew Hook was 'fraid of zombies?

**#95 Do not sell your allies, no matter how annoying they may be**  
Rumble and Frenzy were being SUPER annoying  
And Swindle happened to drop by  
He tried to sell me something  
I think it was a Cybertronian spoon  
I interrupted him before he could kill me from boredom  
I told him, "I'll make you a deal. The two cassettes, Rumble and Frenzy, for 5 bucks"  
Swindle agreed  
Soundwave was NOT happy

**#96 Soundwave is not the Cassetticon's father**  
I was just curious  
So I decided to ask Soundwave  
And the cassetticons happened to be in the room  
Drinking energon  
So they spewed it all over me  
And Soundwave just MIGHT have looked startled  
Turns out they are NOT related  
Like really close friends that are Soundwave's mini troops  
Besides  
Who would Soundwave be married to?  
Never mind  
I don't wanna know

**#97 Do not let the twins play any Mario related games**  
They were bored  
_Somebody_ let them play Super Mario Bros  
They then got this _crazy_ idea to play it in real life  
They somehow got everyone in on it (except me)  
I was talking with Frenzy  
And Megatron captured me  
I was aparently the princess  
And Megatron was Bowser  
Frenzy and Rumble (Mario and Lugi) "rescued" me  
While saving me, they dropped me, like, _five_ times  
And I'm tired of stepping in squashed mushrooms (Goombas)!

**#98 Do not mess with ****_my_**** alt. mode unless you know what you're doing**  
I was innocently recharging  
I had done nothing! (Except for gluing Hook's hand to Mixmaster's pede)  
Then _they_ (you know, the terrible two) came in  
And started messing around with my alt. mode  
Yes  
I was recharging...in my alt. mode (weirder things have happened!)  
And somehow...  
Someway...  
They changed my alt. mode  
…to a cell phone  
Every tried chasing someone while you're a cell phone?  
Not the easiest thing in the world to do

**#99 Do not let Rumble and Frenzy convince you to go to an Autobot/Decepticon showdown**  
I don't know how they do it  
They must have a talent  
Anywho, Blaster and Soundwave were having a showdown  
We were hidden in the rubble  
Soundwave was getting the upperhand (err, servo)  
Blaster was down and Soundwave advanced towards him  
He then did the single scariest thing ever  
HE. LAUGHED.  
Not the monotone, emotionless laugh you would expect  
Which made it all the scarier  
It was super freaky  
I ran out of there screaming  
Which made both mechs stare at me  
And Blaster then had an advantage on Soundwave  
Soundwave lost  
I keep telling you Soundwave, it's not my fault  
It's _your_ fault you laughed that creepy laugh

**#100 You do not have The Touch**  
Rumble and Frenzy dragged me to the battlefield  
And Megatron was fighting Optimack (at least I _think_ that's his name...)  
I then noticed something  
~You got the touch...  
You got the poooowwwwwwwwwer,  
YEAH!~  
So I asked Rumble what that was  
For the first time, the twins noticed  
It only played when Megatron battled Optimack  
It seemingly appeared out of nowhere  
So we dubbed it "You got the touch, you got the power, yeah"  
Or the shortened version, "You got the touch"  
Or the shortened shortened version "the touch"  
Rumble and Frenzy tried to get it to play for them  
Never did  
Ha ha!  
Frenzy: It didn't for you either  
Me: I didn't try all the things YOU guys did  
Rumble: Right, *laugh* You did more!  
Me: …be quiet

**Wheeliefan101: Ha ha! How is ****_that_**** for dropping a bomb on ya? Totally unexpected! *fist pump* ...yeah, okay, probably not.**

**R&R, haters gonna hate and all that Jazz :D**

**Jazz: *looks up from data-pad* Huh?**


	11. Offense! Offense!

**Wheeliefan101: Ha ha ha! *runs around like maniac* Guess what I stole!~ Lugnut's P.O.K.E.!**

**Lugnut: GAH! YOU! INSECT! YOU DARE DEFIY A FOLLOWER OF THE GREAT AND ****_GLORIOUS_**** MEGATRON?!**

**Wheeliefan101: Um...let me think...yup**

**Lugnut: You shall pay, human!**

**Wheeliefan101: Sorry. I'm broke. But I have something better! Wheeliefan101 does not own transformers or intend this for offense :)**

**Lugnut: Prepare to die!**

**Wheeliefan101: No way! I disclaimed so you can't hurt me**

**Lugnut: I follow the glorious Decepticons!**

**Wheelifena101: ...so?**

**Lugnut: So I do not follow the rules! *grabs back-up P.O.K.E.* Prepare to be P.O.K.E.d!**

**Wheeliefan101: What the?! No way! *grabs actual P.O.K.E.* Prepare to be P.O.K.E.d back! *looks at first rule* Ooh! Hey, look, my name! ^3^**

**Lugnut: *P.O.K.E.s author***

**Wheeliefan101: *flies through air* WWWWHHHHHHHHYYYYY?! Oooh, hey, I can see my house from up here!**

Chapter 11: Offense! Offense!

**#101 I am not responsible for how I defend myself when you tickle me**  
Rumble and Frenzy found a new weapon to use against me:  
Tickling  
I was alone in my room  
Then I was tickle attacked!  
While laughing in uncontrolable fits, I may or may not have kicked them across the room  
…into a wall  
…in the next room  
…and they only stopped because Astrotrain's foot was in the way

**#102 If Megatron is mad, no matter how funny it is, ****_DO. NOT. LAUGH!_**  
Megatron was super annoyed that one of his "brilliant schemes" failed (surprise, surprise)  
He was reprimanding everybody  
And I do mean _everybody_  
Megatron, I was not ON the battlefield so stop telling me I need to improve my stealth skills  
Megatron was pacing, and I was bored  
Then Frenzy whispered something hillarious to Rumble  
Who whispered it to me  
It was SOOOOOO hard not to laugh  
Our willpower eventually let out  
Megatron was NOT happy  
And he-  
Well...  
I _would_ tell you but I want to keep from rating this NC-17

**#103 No playing peanutbutter jelly time for five hours straight**  
_Rumble_  
_Frenzy_  
I'm gonna kill you  
You can't hide forever  
I'll admit, the song's not _that_ bad  
But listening to it over and over makes one tire of it  
They _would_ have played it longer  
But I jammed it up  
…with peanutbutter and jelly!  
Oh the irony! MWHAHAHAHAHAHA!

**#104 Always release your passenger before transforming**  
STARSCREAM!  
THAT IS THE LAST TIME I EVER RIDE WITH YOU!  
I DON'T CARE IF RUMBLE AND FRENZY ARE GONE AND SOUNDWAVE PUTS YOU IN CHARGE OF ME!  
Nearly everyone was at the battle  
Everyone except Starscream and me  
He kept whining about how he shouldn't have to "babysit" me  
Then they needed back-up  
And he couldn't just LEAVE me at base  
Just imagine all the chaos I would cause! (On second thought, you might not want to, your head might explode)  
So I had to ride in him  
Very akward  
When we got to the battlefield, he must've forgotten about me  
Because he transformed  
…with me inside him  
Ever been inside a transforming transformer?  
NOT. FUN.  
I puked about five times  
When we got to back base, he _FINALLY_ remembered I was in him  
I'm going to kill that seeker

**#105 No quoting the Decepticons**  
"You failed me yet again, Starscream."  
Me after Starscream let me out of him and the world stopped spinning  
Unfortunately, Megatron was also in the room  
He was NOT happy  
"Don't worry. We'll make them regret undooming themselves."  
Rumble talking to Frenzy in a video game when my team beat theirs  
Payback did hurt .  
"I don't care if the entire EARTH explodes!"  
Astrotrain when-  
…you don't wanna know  
"Looks like the big boy needs a little training!"  
Me when Rumble was having target practice with Frenzy said I couldn't join them because they were doing "big boy" stuff  
Then he promptly missed  
Insert quote  
"Skywarp, think fast!"  
What I yelled to Skywarp when I jumped at him  
He did NOT compute quickly  
We both fell  
Ouch .

**#106 Do not try and hide the fact from Rumble and Frenzy that it's your birthday**  
I was hiding from Rumble and Frenzy  
Because I'm afraid I would blab it was my birthday  
They knew I was avoiding them  
So they set up a trap and ambushed me  
I was forced to tell them  
At first they didn't get it  
But then I told them what it meant  
They said "oh" and then left me alone  
I thought that was the end of it  
Living this long with Rumble and Frenzy I should've known better  
They gave me a surprise birthday party  
Party=trouble  
Trouble is R 'n' F's middle name  
Scratch that  
It's their first, last, AND middle name  
Let's just say it didn't end well  
As in, half-the-base-blew-sky-high kind of ending  
Well...at least they tried :)

**#107 No standing near stairs when Skywarp is around**  
Rumble and Frenzy were downstairs and they were trying to tell me something  
I, being the lazy person I was, didn't bother to go downstairs and just yelled down to them from the top of the stairs  
I leaned just a _little_ bit closer to the stairs and...  
TUMBLED DOWN THEM AT 2,000,000,000 MILES PER SECOND!  
(Okay, maybe I'm exagerating a little)  
Turns out Skywarp had teleported behind me and shoved me down the stairs  
...I found out what the twins wanted (and received a few bruises and scratches as a bonus)  
They wanted to tell me Skywarp was coming up behind me

**#108 No making fun of Megatron's alt. mode**  
It's the twin's fault  
They brought me to the battle  
Megatron decided to transform to his alt. mode  
It was a _gun_  
A little handheld _gun_  
And he couldn't move by himself  
He had to get _Starscream_ to fire his alt. mode  
I kinda rolled on the floor laughing  
That gun may be small, but it has some _FIREPOWER_!  
But Megatron wouldn't let Hook fix me  
Excuse me, I must wallow in self pity T.T

**#109 No giving away that you're the Decepticon's hostage**  
I was on battle  
I actually _shot_ something (although it was just the broad side of a barn)  
So I said, "YES! One point for Tammi!"  
Then some of the Autobots began whispering about 'wasn't Tammi the human captured by the Decepticons?'  
Rumble and Frenzy didn't like that  
So they told them I wasn't called Tammi  
I was called Backfire  
I interrupted them and said my name was Electric Storm  
When we got back to base, I got lectured  
Ever been lectured by the twins?  
WORST. LECTURE. EVER!  
I am NOT going to be called "Backfire"...

**#110 Just because I am the only femme (even if I am only half Cybertronian) on the base (or one of the _only_ femmes for that matter) does not mean I will mate**  
Rumble and Frenzy, you are SO immature  
Asking questions like "will I mate with any one on the base"  
Made me choke on my soda :(  
In case you guys haven't noticed  
I'm not just the only (half) femme  
I'm also the _youngest_  
If any of you other 'cons get any ideas...  
I will not be afraid to use a spoon against you

**Wheeliefan101: Ta-da! So now she has a Cybertronian name! And in case any of you are wondering, she turns into a Porsche Boxster ^-^ Thank you to all you people who review, fav, follow and read! You feed baby Ratbat! *holds up adorable little baby Cassetticon bat***

**Soundwave: Demand: return Ratbat. Penalty: destruction**

**Wheeliefan101: Uh-oh! *runs around* YOU'LL NEVER GET HIM BACK! HE'S TOO CUTE!**

**Soundwave: Laserbeak, Ravage, Rumble, Frenzy, Buzzsaw: eject. Operation: termination**

**Wheeliefan101: o.O Oh crud *being chased by Cassetticons* RRRRRRRRRR AAAAAAANNNNNNDDDDDD RRRRRRRR! **


	12. DEFENSE! DEFENSE!

**Wheeliefan101: *runs by* WooOOOooo! I'm a ghost!**

**Bumblebee: *chases her* Get back here! That phaseshifter is not yours! D:**

**Wheeliefan101: It is now! :D**

**Bumblebee: Gosh, I hate you...**

**Wheeliefan101: Love ya too, Bumbles. Wheeliefan101 does not own transformers *walks through wall* or intend this for offense! *accidently walks into room* Ooh, what's in here?**

***five seconds later***

**Wheeliefan101: AH! *runs out* O.O Never EVER go in that room!**

**Bumblebee: *shakes head* I guess she found the mechs' bathroom...**

Chapter 12: DEFENSE! DEFENSE!

**#111 No avoiding bath time**  
We all came back from a DIRTY battle  
Megatron decided that our condition was unacceptable  
So he made "bath time"  
Which is code name for "Thirty tortureus minutes where Thundercracker gets to spray us with cold water"  
*shivers*  
OH THE HORROR!  
Some of the 'cons tried to avoid it  
They got caught  
By me (:D)  
I told them to "mech up"  
"Electric Storm, you're next."  
I am going to DIE!

**#112 Following the rule above, no hiding fugitives**  
I was hiding in a very secret place  
Rumble and Frenzy found me  
They wanted to hide with me  
I told them to go away  
They cut me a deal  
I let them hide there, they don't tattle on me to the serial killer-I mean Thundercracker  
We both got found  
And we both got EXTRA clean for hiding fugitives (I'm not sure if _I_ or the TWINS were the fugutives)  
I am going to get Thundercracker with that tool of evil...

**#113 No using a hose against Thundercracker**  
The twins and I have been avenged!  
I grabbed the hose from Thundercracker  
And used it against him!  
HAHAHA! :D  
Even though I got thrown in the brig...  
It was worth it!

**#114 Keep your quarters clean**  
I don't like cleaning my room  
Like, AT ALL  
So it was _really_ messy  
Rumble and Frenzy wanted to show me something  
But they had to come into my room to get me  
I mean my room wasn't exactly THAT bad  
…but I got worried when R 'n' F started to drown  
…in my stuff  
We had to call a Search and Rescue team to dig them out  
That's when I decided my room MAY need a little bit of tidying up

**#115 Just because there's a hole that your finger would fit in, that does not mean you should put your finger in it**  
There was a small hole in the machine that would help Megatron achieve his "brilliant scheme"  
Curiosity killed the cat  
But NOT knowing would kill you also  
So I stuck my finger in it  
There were some slicing things in it  
The slicing things nearly sliced my WHOLE DARN FINGER OFF!  
I barely escaped with my (finger's) life

**#116 No taking the Decepticons ice skating**  
Everybody had to investigate an energy signature  
And I do mean EVERYBODY  
They even took _me_ along  
Turns out the energy signature was fake  
Megatron got very mad while expanding my vocabulary into a more colorful region  
I saw that a HUGE lake had iced over  
So I suggested we went ice skating  
At first, they all looked at me like, "Is your brain connected?"  
But I finally convinced them  
I tried to test the ice  
But Frenzy ran onto the ice  
He, of course, slipped and fell  
We then determined the ice was thick  
VERY thick  
We all tried out ice skating  
A lot of us fell, though  
Did you know seekers were graceful on ice? (Showoffs)  
Soundwave...not so much  
He kept falling over  
He finally went off to the side, saying to skate on this ice was illogical  
So the twins and I called him what he was  
A sore sport  
I think the Autobots came around at some point  
But they must've decided we were too silly to bother with (either that, or they all glitched)  
Things were going fine and dandy until _DEVESTATOR_ decided to join the fun (why, Constructions, why?)  
He punched a BIG hole in the ice  
To which we all fell in  
I had it the worse since I was in my human mode  
Received a cold  
It was worth it!

**#117 You do not have the force**  
We (the twins and I) had recently watched Star Wars  
And we were running from Astrotrain  
…because we had painted him to look like Princess Laya  
We were cornered  
So I tried waving my hand in front of me and saying, "These are not the droids you are looking for."  
Did NOT work  
We tried to unlock the brig by using the Force  
_Still_ didn't work

**#118 No quoting Junie B. Jones**  
"Girls can be anything boys can be. 'Cause I saw that on Sesame Street. And also on Oprah."  
Me when Skywarp said I couldn't become a seeker  
He then pointed out it was because I didn't have wings  
So I sang "~Ha ha I can't hear you! Ha ha I can't hear you!~"  
"Now I can be the king and this can be my throne. And your my servant named Pinky. And you have to fetch me stuff. Also, I get to hit you on the head with my sword."  
I am _not_ your servant named Pinky,  
Rumble, Frenzy  
I also don't care if you're up in the rafters  
I chased those two down  
"Only I didn't give you permission to do that, _Pinky_."  
My reply:  
"Hey, SHUT UP YOUR FACE!"

**#119 No singing "I wish I was an Oscar Meyer Weiner" repeadtedly**  
Rumble and Frenzy,  
I do wish you were an Oscar Meyer Weiner…  
SO I COULD EAT YOU!  
It was fine the first few times,  
But after the 250,000th time...  
It got REALLY ANNOYING  
A lot of the 'cons complained about it  
But it was like the weather  
They all complained but didn't do anything about it  
So I finally screamed, "BOTH OF YOU, SHUT YOUR BIG-FAT-HOT-DOG-LOVING-LOOKING-FOR-LOVE TRAPS!"  
And then I threw a hot dog at them  
Oh the irony! :D

**#120 No throwing allies at your...er, other allies**  
Astrotrain was REALLY ticking me off  
So I pulled something from the Nutcracker  
I threw my shoe at his head  
…and missed completely  
So I threw my other shoe  
I missed again  
Astrotrain kept taunting and teasing me  
I got SO frustrated that I grabbed Rumble and threw him at Astrotrain  
I finally hit him!  
But wound up in the brig...  
And had to help with fixing up Rumble  
…sorry Rumble

**Wheeliefan101: ~Sunny days, chasing the, clouds away!~**

**Brawl: .~_.^**

**Wheeliefan101: ~Won't you tell me how to get, how to get to Sesame Street?~ **

**Brawl: What...are you singing?**

**Wheeliefan101: Sesame Street :)**

**Brawl: But...why?**

**Wheeliefan101: It was stuck in my head :)**

**Brawl: O...kay...**

**Wheeliefan101: R&R and I'll get Brawl to sing Elmo's world!**

**Brawl: Wha-?! I never agreed to this!**

**Wheeliefan101: Too late! You already said you did!~**

**Brawl: When?!**

**Wheeliefan101: When you said the words "I" "agreed" "to" and "this" :)**

**Brawl: WHY YOU LITTLE-**

**Wheeliefan101: *gasp* Brawl! Do NOT finish that sentence! There are little ears here!**

**Brawl: #%# ING #^ % YOUR $ #^#ING % !$ OF A !$#*^%%ER!**

**Wheeliefan101: 0_0 ...I honestly never knew you knew that many colorful words, Brawl. Or that you knew how to properly use them in a sentence...**


	13. A writer's worries

**Wheeliefan101: *waving Drift's sword around* Guess what I stole this time! Drift's hu-gian-taniamous sword! *shifty eyes* I better disclaim before ol' Drifters notices his sword is missing. *clears throat* I don't own transformers or intend for this to offend anyone. Well, it could offend Bumblebee, I would be fine with that :D**

**Bumblebee: T.T**

**Wheeliefan101: Yeesh, what a cry baby -_-**

**Bumblebee: *pulls out Megatron's fusion cannon* }:(**

**Wheeliefan101: O.O Wait, where did you get tha-**

**Bumblebee: *shoots Wheeliefan101***

**Wheeliefan101: AAAAAAAAHHHHH! *lands in wall* Ug *looks at sword* THIS. DID. NOTHING!**

Chapter 13: A writer's worries

**#121 Enough people are already a critic, I do not need your feedback**  
I played the violin  
So I had to practice at base sometimes  
Every so often, the Decepticons would comment on my playing  
It usually wasn't very positive  
Then the twins decided to drop by  
I didn't really mind Frenzy that much  
He actually _helped_ me improve  
Who knew Frenzy knew so much about violins?  
But Rumble was no help at all  
He kept critizing EVERY. LITTLE. THING!  
I got so fed up  
...I threw my violin at him (my teacher's gonna kill me...)

**#122 When one of the twins come, stay away from them, far, far away**  
Aw, who am I kidding?  
Rumble and Frenzy are gonna drag you out to meet their friend no matter where you are  
I TRIED hiding  
Believe me, I tried  
They still found me  
I TRIED to be nice to their friend  
But he's so...much like them  
The guy's name was Enemy  
Wait  
If they're so much like R 'n' F, does that mean it's like he's a third twin?  
O_O  
Oh sweet mercy...  
...just kill me now

**#123 Do not take everything I say seriously**  
I said, "Just kill me now"  
Enemy took me seriously  
He literally tried to KILL me  
It took Rumble and Frenzy a while to convince Enemy I was just kidding  
I am not liking this guy very much, currently...

**#124 If I'm writing rules, I do not need your help**  
It gets annoying when I'm writing rules and you guys interrupt what I'm typing and-  
Frenzy: But have you _seen_ some of the rules you come up with? BORING!  
-I have to edit it  
Rumble: I agree with Frenzy. Ya've got bland rules. We like ta spice them up  
Me: Did I ask for your opinion? _Nooooooooo_  
Frenzy: We're Decepticons. Do ya think we really care?  
Me: -_- But stop it. It's annoying  
Rumble: If it weren't for us, you wouldn't have anything ta write about!  
Me: If you guys would leave me alone, I would get a lot more writing done. Now please, LEAVE ME ALONE!  
Both: But-  
Me: *brutally attacks Rumble and Frenzy*

**#125 No shouting "Daddy!" to Shockwave and then tackling him**  
Shockwave came to visit  
Again  
And, in case you've forgotten, he was the one who turned me half Cybertronian  
Rumble and Frenzy MADE me go out and talk to him  
So, when I saw him, I yelled, "Daddy!" and tackled him  
After he pried me off him, he said it was illogical that I call him his male parental unit  
I told him I did not _care_  
_He_ was the one who turned me into this half alien  
After I started yelling at him, Rumble and Frenzy had to drag me away because I was a LITTLE out of control  
Okay, maybe a lot

**#126 No using Megatron's enemy's quotes against him**  
Rumble, Frenzy, and I were having fun  
Which meant all the other 'cons were getting annoyed  
Megatron told us to stop  
So we kept on being annoying  
Soundwave-who seemed to have the most control over us-ordered "Rumble, Frenzy, Electric Storm: display of actions: immature. Suggestion: act age."  
I gave Soundwave a serious look, and in my best Optimus voice, I told him "But Soundwave, immaturity is the right of all sentient beings"  
We nearly _died_ laughing  
Although Megatron didn't find it funny  
AT ALL  
Ever seen Megatron's optic twitch?  
VERY. SCARY.  
I _still_ have nightmares of what happened after that!

**#127 No screaming random Italian words**  
I had been looking up some Italian words for no real reason (because I was bored and Hook wouldn't let me comunicate with the outside world because I was stuck in the med-bay)  
And Rumble and Frenzy dragged me along to the meeting we were having with the President of the United States  
As in give-us-all-you-own-or-die kind of meeting  
I was getting bored  
So I screamed "Scimmie sono nei pantaloni e le mie claze sono viola!"*  
Everything got real quite, real fast  
After that, I was no longer allowed to go to meetings

**#128 No provoking my short attention span**  
I get distracted by other things really easily  
The twins took advantage of this  
I eventually got mad at them  
So I out right ignored those two  
…for five minutes (hey, it's a new record)

**#129 No writing an "I survived living with the Decepticons" book**  
It actually wasn't a half bad book  
The Decepticons begged to differ  
They got mad  
Like REALLY mad  
Rumble and Frenzy especially about the part I mentioned about the two meneces I lived with  
Hey, surviving living in the same space with you guys should be an achievement!

**#130 No messing with Trypticon**  
Because, first of all, he's a giant DINOSAUR  
Second of all,  
...well, you really only need the first reason  
But did that stop Rumble, Frenzy, and me from poking fun at him?  
Noooooooo  
We payed dearly for the consequences  
I'm SOOOOOOOOOO glad we can run fast when our lives our threatened by a giant dinosaur foot

* * *

***Monkeys are in my pants and my claze are purple**

* * *

Translate

Monkeys are in my pants and my claze are purple

**Wheeliefan101: *has arm sling* Hey, peoples. Thanks to Bumblers, I have to wear this sling thing. And I can't even sling it at anybody! Dis-appoint-ment!**

**Bumblebee: *crosses arms* You totally deserved it**

**Wheeliefan101: Well, ow! Somebody woke up on the wrong side of the berth! Anyway, my muse sprouted wings and flew out the window, my inspiration trickled down the drain while I was in the shower, and my will to write took a vacation in Montana so it might take me, like, a super-de-duperdy long time to update my stories.**

**Bumblebee: *gasp* Shame! *points* To the Naughty Corner!**

**Wheeliefan101: What, again? Awww, man! Anyway, please review, it gets my will to write to send me post cards! :D**


	14. Communication mix up

**Wheeliefan101: Howdy, ya'll! I'm back! And guess what! I don't intend this for offense. Oh. And I also don't own transformers...still (if Hasbro would just let me BORROW it for a while...)**

**Ironhide: 101, we 'ave a situataion 'ere**

**Wheeliefan101: What?**

**Ironhide: It's so terrible...**

**Wheeliefan101: What?!**

**Ironhide: Ah can barely stand it...**

**Wheeliefan101: What?! What?! WHAT?!**

**Ironhide: We're all outta...brace yarself...BROCCOLI**

**Wheeliefan101: -_-**

**Ironhide: Don't worry. We 'ave this *holds up cash***

**Wheeliefan101: Ironhide? That's Carly's. We can't use it**

**Ironhide: That's why we 'ave this *holds up credit card***

**Wheeliefan101: *facepalm***

Chapter 14: Communication mix up

**#131 No asking Starscream for help with your homework**  
It's not exactly _what_ he did  
It's _where_ we went  
I asked 'Screamer for help with my science homework  
Because he's a _scientist_ and all...  
But the other 'cons were being WAY too loud  
So we had to go outside  
…alone  
We didn't DO anything besides discuss homework  
Oh, B.T.W. if I thought science hard was now, Starscream was showing me a whole new ball game  
Back to the original thing  
The Decepticons get supcious with us being alone for so long  
They thought we were lovers  
That picture outside our quaters did NOT help matters  
Rumble and Frenzy photoshopped that  
I PROMISE!  
I would rather call Megatron a chicken (which is a _REALLY_ bad idea, believe me, I've tried...and lost a lot of blood) and take my chances running than even _think_ of kissing Starscream!

**#132 No using ninja moves on others**  
On that note, no more watching Ninja or related movies  
There was no need to air-jump-kick me in the back!  
Rumble: But'cha were chokin'!  
Me: That's beside the point!  
Anyway  
I was, er, choking  
And writhing on the ground  
So Frenzy and Rumble jump-air-kicked me on the back once they figured out what was going (either that, or I was just their lucky target)  
But those two DID save me  
Although you still gave me some real bad bruises on my back!

**#133 No messing with your vocal processors**  
Heh heh  
I recently found out you can make your vocal processors into these really cool voices  
So I started imitating the other 'cons  
R 'n' F were the ones who laughed the hardest  
'Til I imitated them  
I got beat up .  
I also went over the inter comm. thingy and said (in Optimus' voice) "Attetion Decepticons, we have the base surrounded. If you do not surrender, we will ignite the bomb planted in the center of your base, planted by Wheeljack."  
Insert Wheeljack saying hello  
"You can't escape. We hope you enjoy your doom. Good-bye."  
Absolute CHAOS

**#134 Electrum is a bad idea**  
I didn't actually _know_ it was Electrum  
I just thought it was glitter!  
I was in the Constructicon's quarters (Hook's med-bay was wrecked because of an accident with a toaster, blender, and a cigurette lighter. Don't ask)  
Lemme tell ya, being in there was very...  
How do I put this nicely?  
EXCRUCIATINGLY BORING  
Yeah, that pretty much summed it up  
So, I was bored and started snooping around  
And I saw what I thought was a big container of glitter  
It was _way_ up on the _tippy-top_ shelf  
So I tried to get it  
But, even in my Cybertronian mode, I could barely reach it  
I ended up jumping up and swatting at the glitter  
It opened up and spilled all over me  
I shrieked like the little girl I was and the Constructions came in  
They told me I was covered in Electrum  
I tried changing to my human form  
I thought I was going to be my original human colors  
Nope  
No such luck  
I was still gold  
The Decepticons tried to convince me all the upsides of it  
I was invincible!  
I could pull more pranks and not get hurt! (This was Rumble and Frenzy's idea -_-)  
I was shiny!  
So I gave them the BIGGEST reason it was a bad idea  
I HAD TO GO TO SCHOOL TOMORROW AND I WAS GOLDEN!  
The princable was not happy with my "body paint" as he called it  
Although the other kids thought it was funny  
B.T.W., they were laughing at me, not with me T.T

**#135 No visiting the prisoners**  
The Decepticons were at a battle  
They brought back a prisoner  
His name was something like Cakebeacon  
Butchcrack?  
Beachcomber! Yeah, that's it!  
Anyway, Beachcomber was in a prison cell  
Rumble and Frenzy were teasing him  
I felt kind of bad for the Autobot  
So I wanted to do something nice for him  
I brought him some sweet energon* that I had been saving for a rainy day (that, or until Rumble and Frenzy got their grubby little servos on it)  
I had to ask Soundwave permission  
He gave me the A-Okay  
So I decided to deliver it with a little flare  
Okay, okay so I only put it on a tray and put a partially dead flower next to it  
Yeesh!  
I opened the cell doors, went in, and closed it behind me (I'm not THAT stupid)  
He wasn't in there  
I felt pretty confused, wondering if I had the wrong cell when...  
HE ATTACKED ME FROM THE SKY!  
I should have expected it  
They do that in ALL the movies  
I finally got Beancream-no, wait, I mean Beachcomber-off me  
He got mad at me and said some pretty nasty things about me being a Decepticon  
I dropped the energon/tray/partially dead flower and yelled, "I was just trying to help! Excuse me for being nice!"  
I then left, shutting the cell doors behind me  
…but I still left the energon

**#136 No harassing the Combiners**  
We were not _harassing_ the Combiners  
We were _annoying_ them  
Anyway, Rumble and Frenzy were bored  
Rumble&Frenzy+boredom=Trouble for me  
They convinced me to help them pester Breakdown  
He's kind of our equivalent to the Autobots, um, Rain Apple  
Rash Ash?  
I don't know  
Anyway, he's kind of...  
REALLY, SUPER PARANOID  
So we kept annoying him with our silly questions  
We didn't _mean_ to scare him! (At least _I_ didn't mean to)  
He had a mental, uh, breakdown  
When his other Stunticon pals heard about that, they instantly came over  
They didn't beat us up  
Oh no  
That would be too easy  
They merged into Menasor and _then_ beat us up

**#137 No imitating Megatron's evil laugh then using it to mock him**  
Megatron had just defeated the Autobots (for now) and he went into this long winded speech  
Frankly, I was bored  
Megatron began nearing the end of his speech  
Rumble and Frenzy started poking me  
They then told me Megatron was going to do his evil laughter  
And they DEMANDED (not "please will you do this" but "you have to do this or I'll pound your face in") I do an evil laugh with him  
Well I couldn't exactly say no  
They were still poking me  
And one could die from over poke exposure  
So when Megatron began his evil laughter, I laughed with him  
For good measure, I started coughing in the middle of it  
Which turned into hacking  
Which made Megatron stop and everybot and everycon stared at me  
So, while I was in the spotlight, I began gagging and cluthcing at my throat  
Which ended with me passing out  
The Decepticons shook their helms at me while the Autobots just stared  
What can I say?  
The camera loves me

**#138 No dressing up as an Autobot**  
…this should be pretty obvious  
I mean, ya see an Autobot (A.K.A. an enemy) in the Decepticon (A.K.A. ally) base, hello!  
Common sense!  
But since when do I have that?  
Anyway, I spent hours, slaving away over a...  
Okay  
I'm not exactly sure _what_ I was slaving over, but I _did_ know Mixmaster made it to make replicas of transformers  
A few tweaks, and voilá!  
I blew it up!  
So I had to get another one and ask Rumble and Frenzy to make the proper adjustments  
Back to the rule  
I was slaving away on a thing-a-ma-jig, perfecting the prank of the century!  
Eh, prank of the week  
I had made it to look like that guy Rockjumper, or something like that  
I heard he accused people of being traitors  
The 'cons went balistic when they saw me-err, Rockjumper  
But when they found out it was just me...  
I got thrown in the brig, had to promise to never pull a stunt like this again, say sorry to everybody on base (which took a LONG time-there are a lot of 'cons on base) and fertelize Long Haul's Thyme garden (don't ask)  
Then they got the guy Rockjumper to come over here and beat me up  
WHAT THE HECK?!

**#139 No more dancing lessons**  
Somehow...  
Someway...  
Somebody created a portal to an alternate dimemsion  
Stop denying it, Constructicons! I know it was you!  
An alternate dimension Blitzwing came in  
His faces kept switching with different emotions  
…creepy…  
Anyway, Blitzwing was stuck on the face which I had dubbed "Jack-o-Latern face"  
...and he was trying to teach me how to dance  
Very awkward  
Rumble and Frenzy didn't lift a finger to help  
Guess it's kinda hard to help someone when you're DYING OF LAUGHTER! D:{  
I have never been so glad to see an alternate dimension Decepticon return to their own world  
Although...since when have I ever seen ANYONE return to their dimension?

**#140 No replacing a Decepticon's ammo with human food**  
Rumble and Frenzy pulled a REALLY good prank on Thundercracker  
Which will remain a secret to save his dignity (and because he's right behind me, pressing a gun to my back)  
The twins made the mistake of saying that they were going to blame me  
Working quickly, I filled Skywarp's gun with a certain food because I _knew_ he was going to try and shoot me (yes, it was _that_ bad)  
Imagine the purple seeker's surprise when his gun shot out _cake_  
Although it turns out that the cake oozed into sensitive wires  
Now Hook is mad at me too  
Well _excuse me_ but I don't exactly dying!

* * *

***_sweet energon is much like human candy-a sweetened version of energon, thus the name_**

* * *

**Ironhide: C'mon, 101, we 'ave ta go ta the stores behfore they close!**

**Wheeliefan101: Ironhide, no! I don't want to go to the stores for broccoli! NOBODY LIKES BROCCOLI!**

**Ironhide: Ah do**

**Wheeliefan101: So?!**

**Ironhide: *points gun at me* Ah also have a gun**

**Wheeliefan101: O_O ...fine...**

**Ironhide: Yay! ^_^**

**Wheeliefan101: Oy...-_- R&R plz**


	15. Sleepy slip ups

**Wheeliefan101: ****_Arrrrrrrriba_****!~ *wearing sombrero and carrying maracas* Hola, senors and senoritas! We is gonna have a fiesta!**

**Mixmaster: ...what are you doing? **

**Wheeliefan101: Isn't it obvious, senor? I'm doing something involving something Spanish!**

**Mixmaster: But why?**

**Wheeliefan101: Because there's Spanish-y sounding music on my Ipod! :D**

**Mixmaster: You don't know anything Spanish, do you?**

**Wheeliefan101: No...no I don't :( Great. Now you ruined my festive mood. Wheeliefan101 does not intend this for offense or own transformers. I'm gonna go cry over some tacos now... T_T**

Chapter 15: Sleepy slip ups

**#141 No sneaking into Autobot base**  
The twins and I were playing a game we made up  
We asked each other questions and we had to answer the right answer  
The first time someone doesn't answer the question right, the rest of the players get to decide a dare the person has to do  
Things got intense  
But then Rumble asked me, "There was a red light and a bus driver didn't stop. He turned around in a one way only zone. He went right past a cop car and didn't get caught. How?"  
I had no answer  
So Rumble and Frenzy had to come up with a dare  
Really easy for those sly dogs...  
They dared me to sleep in the Autobots base without getting caught  
They of course sent Laserbeak with me so they could be sure I did it and to make sure I didn't try and run away  
I snuck in there easy enough  
I even was able to fall asleep!  
But Sideswipe and his brother saw me  
Instead of killing me on the spot, they did some..._paintjob modifications_ on me  
Sunstreaker being an artist did NOT help  
He got very...creative  
I came back to D-con base...in a clown paint scheme...  
*facepalm*

**#142 No more sleepovers**  
It's not _my_ fault  
Those girls followed me home!  
I tried to tell them to get lost  
But would they listen?  
_Nooooooo_  
So I brought them to R 'n' F  
My classmates weren't impressed  
They were giant alien robots, for crying out loud!  
And they get excited when a cute boy looks at them!  
What the_ heck_?  
And when I tried to get the twins to make the girls leave, they let them stay  
Thanks a lot guys, you're really there for me -_-  
Anyway, the night was...less than sucessful  
The Decepticons just kept on scaring us  
Correction:  
Scaring _them_  
Those girls squealed louder than a pig about to got to the smoke house  
And the "who do you like" game?  
Probably would have been fine if it hadn't been my turn when Rumble and Frenzy came in  
They decided to stay to find who exactly I liked  
Never again

**#143 If you know a mech's secret, you'd better not even ****_think_**** of spilling it**  
Mechs are very touchy about their privacy  
And I just _happened_ to learn something very _interesting_  
I learned that Wildrider *sees Wildrider* uh...has a secret  
After nearly dying of laughter, I went off  
Well, I _tried_ to go on my merry way  
Wildrider didn't exactly _let_ me leave  
He told me I had better not tell _anyone_  
I promised Boyscout honor (it doesn't MATTER that I'm not a Boyscout! I don't know any other way to communicate my promise!)  
Do you think he cared?  
_Noooooooo_  
Rumble and Frenzy were gonna pull a prank  
So they searched all around for me  
The twins finally found me in a closet  
…hanging upside down  
…tied up  
...with a gag  
The troublesom two finally untied me (Wildrider is apparently real good with knots)  
I _would_ have told them what happened, but Wildrider happened to walk by and...  
Well  
You can imagine  
P.S. Wildrider is proofreading this to make sure I don't spill his secret

**#144 No shoving R 'n' F into a cassette player, even if they are cassettes**  
Rumble and Frenzy did something that made me SUPER mad  
Before I could do something stupid, Soundwave ordered them to "return"  
But while they flew back to 'Wave, I snatched them up and shoved them into my cassette player  
I then slammed the button on rewind  
It couldn't hurt them _that_ much, right?  
WRONG  
It hurt them a LOT  
They may have even _cried_ a little bit  
I payed my time in the brig and apologized to the twins  
Don't look at me like that!  
I was mad!

**#145 No talking with the prisoners**  
Rumble and Frenzy put me on prisoner duty -_-  
Which basically meant I had to stand gaurd, guarding the prisoners from...um...something and making sure they don't escape  
As if!  
They couldn't if they tried!  
And believe me, I've tried (accident with the brig, I made sure they couldn't throw me in the brig...they threw me in the prison instead -_-)  
Anyway, the two prisoners, Sideswipe and Sunstreaker (A.K.A. the two 'bots who laughed at me), were um...the prisoners  
Sideswipe was trying to get my attetion  
I was doing pretty good at ignoring them  
Until Sideswipe threw a stray crowbar at me  
Then I _had_ to talk to him  
Sly mech tried to talk me into letting them out  
Now, don't get me wrong, I don't really have anything against the mechs (though I am SO pranking them sometime for laughing at me)  
And I even _wanted_ to let them out (I don't entirely _agree_ with capture)  
But Laser-pest was watching me  
I tried to tell them the cassetticons were watching me  
To prove it, I tried to open the cell door  
And Ravage mauled me  
See?  
I try to do what's right, and I get mauled  
Woe is me

**#146 No watching "Finding Nemo"**  
It was movie night  
Motormaster chose "Finding Nemo"  
Unfortunately, the Autobots decided to poke a hole in our plans  
As in they shot a missle at our base  
They attacked us on movie night!  
Anyway, I knew something was up when water pooled around my ankles  
When the movie was over, a lot of us were completely submerged  
And I didn't think to transform to my robot mode  
I can't swim, either  
But R 'n' F don't have to breath  
So when they saw me drowning, they sang, "~Just keep swimming (ect.)!~"  
And I couldn't yell at them  
The Constructicons eventually got the hole fixed  
The very nerve of being attacked on movie night!

**#147 In the middle of a quiet room, do not cover your ears and yell, "Be quiet, be quiet, be quiet!"**  
Rumble and Frenzy kept me up all night, listening to song over and over and over and over and over and-you get the picture  
Anyway, I woke up and I had the song stuck in my head  
It was a real ANNOYING song  
I walked into a real quiet room  
The only thing I could hear was that song  
I finally got fed up with it  
So I yelled, "Be quiet, be quiet, be quiet!"  
Everyone turned around to stare at me  
I ended up at Hook's med-bay and there was a sanity test  
Rumble and Frenzy, I blame you

**#148 Running away from base is futile**  
I was really upset, coming home from school  
Some kids made me feel real bad  
They weren't _bullying_ me, they probably didn't even know they were hurting me  
But still  
So I was in my room, sulking  
Rumble and Frenzy tried to cheer me up  
But they said I didn't have it as bad as they did  
So I turned on them and demanded to know what made THEM have such a horrible life  
Which lead to a heated argument  
And that ended up with us leaving in a huff  
I was SO upset that I decided to run away  
I filled a knapsack, made plans to hitchike a few miles...  
Only _one_ inseey, weensy problem  
The base was underwater  
Needless to say, I didn't make it very far  
But when I got back, the twins apologized to me and vica versa  
But only because Soundwave made us  
I think he's trying to be a father figure  
But he took it a _little_ too far when he said "kiss and make up"  
*shivers in disgust*  
There is NO way my lips are touching those two!

**#149 No suggesting humans could be a pet**  
Rumble, Frenzy, and I were sitting on a bridge, watching a beautiful sunset  
While watching the brilliant colors, Frenzy came up with an interesting idea  
"What if humans could be a pet?"  
I asked how  
Rumble saw his point  
He explained that because they were weaker than Cybertronians, they could be a pet  
I knocked them both into the river  
What a lovely sunset =)...

**#150 One Direction songs are banned**  
I was sleeping peacefully, dreaming peaceful, non-boyish dreams  
When all of the sudden, out of nowhere,  
"~Baby you light up my world like nobody else!~"  
I fell out of bed, screaming the whole way down  
But it _still_ continued  
"~The way that you flip your hair gets me overwhelmed!~"  
The rest of the Decepticons and me met up  
We all had our ears/audio receptors covered  
So it was hard, yelling over the music, to find out who was responsible  
But after a line-up, we figured out who dun it:  
Rumble and Frenzy  
After SIXTY HOURS of torture, we finally stopped the nerve fraying music  
Wonderful, lovely, silence  
"~So get out, get out, get out of my head and fall into my arms instead!~"  
NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

**Wheeliefan101: Ha ha, that's right, I don't like One Direction. Haters gonna hate and all that stuff**

**Prowl: 101, you have to come to the brig right now**

**Wheeliefan101: ~A-goo goo, a-ga ga, is all I want to say you!~**

**Prowl: o.O *glitch***

**Ratchet: 101! WHY'D YOU DO THAT?!**

**Wheeliefan101: You mean besides the usual joy of making Prowl glitch? My Ipod was playing that song :D**

**Mixmaster: *looks at ratchet and vents* That Ipod is gonna cause a lot of problems, isn't it?**

**Ratchet: Yup -_-**

**Wheeliefan101: Ha ha! :D R&R, oh and, TODAY IS RANDOM PM DAY! PM SOMEONE YOU DON'T KNOW!**


	16. Am I raising soldiers or sissies?

**Wheeliefan101: *on Skyfire***

**Slingshot: Okay, now, number one lesson in skydiving: safety first**

**Wheeliefan101: Kay**

**Slingshot: Rule number two, time your landing**

**Wheeliefan101: Kay**

**Slingshot: Rule number three-**

**Wheeliefan101: JUMP! *jumps off***

**Slingshot: WHAT THE-?! She forgot her parachute!**

**Wheeliefan101: La la la la la!**

**Slingshot: *over comm. link* WHAT THE % $# DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?! YOU DON'T HAVE A PARACHUTE!**

**Wheeliefan101: o.O *looks at ground she's plummenting towards* OMW! WHEELIEFAN101DOESNOTOWNTRANSFORMERSORINTENDTHISFOR OFFENSE! I'MSORRYIHIDTHEREMOTE! PLEASEDON'TKILLME! I'MTOOYOUNGTODIE! I'MTOOYOUNGTO- *splat***

***In med-bay***

**Slingshot: Why'd you jump off?!**

**Wheeliefan101: *shrug* The song told me to**

Chapter 16: Am I raising soldiers or sissies?

**#151 No randomly screaming then denying that you screamed**  
I walked into the middle of the twin's quiet quarters  
And I suddenly got this urge to...scream  
I don't why, but I just did  
So I shrieked as loud as my shrieker would shriek  
Rumble and Frenzy stared at me  
Then they cautiously asked if I was alright  
I replied, "Yeah, why?"  
When they pointed out I had just screamed for no reason, I denied that I had  
They rushed me to Hook immediately  
He made me take a sanity test  
I failed  
Hook locked me in a cell  
And Hook, LET ME OUTTA HERE!

**#152 There are no neutrals in war**  
Rumble, Frenzy and I were playing a deadly game of wits, skills, and instincts:  
Battleship  
Now, you may be thinking, Battleship is a two player game!  
How can 3 people be playing?  
Easy, we played in pairs  
Rumble with Frenzy (duh)  
And me with...Enemy  
Although he was no help -_-  
Pairs make it easier to think and plan (for R 'n' F, I was losing horribly)  
Laserbeak and Buzzsaw were spectators  
They claimed they were "neutrals"  
Yeah, right  
Just like Rumble "happened" to know where my submarine was  
You were spying on me, bird-brains!  
You were working for the twins!  
Don't play innocent with me!  
I'm onto you two like soy sauce on a salami sandwich

**#153 Ravage is like a ninja, a slagging ninja**  
That guy is sneaky -_-  
Really. Sneaky.  
I was in my room, innocently playing a game of hang man...with myself  
Yes, yes, I know, but the twins were neglecting me!  
So, I had almost guessed the whole word (I can be tricky when I want to be) when,  
OUT OF NOWHERE, RAVAGE GROWLED RIGHT BEHIND ME!  
I jumped so high I banged my head on the celeing  
No kidding, look for yourself, there's a dent in the wall that's shaped like my head  
Anyway, Ravage sneaked up on me _72_ more times  
72!  
That cat is scary  
Although I think the twins are putting him up to it  
You see, everytime the twins neglect me, I'm by myself  
Which is when Ravage likes to sneak up on me  
And that can only mean-  
*growl*  
OH MUH GOSH, RAVAGE!

**#154 Drama is not appreciated**  
You shouldn't be a drama queen  
That's Starscream's job  
Anyway, I had a bad day at school so I felt like causing trouble  
More specifically, drama  
I kept dramatically wailing about unimportant things  
Rumble and Frenzy soon joined me  
We got shot at  
Multiple times  
There's a big scorch mark on the floor

**#155 Stop playing the MacGyver theme song when Mixmaster walks by**  
What?  
He's practically the MacGyver of the Decepticons!  
I told the Cassette brothers about this fascinating discovery  
So Rumble and Frenzy rigged the MacGyver theme song to play whenever Mixmaster walked by  
Mixie wasn't happy  
_He_ used his ingenious processor to cook up an evil plan  
The theme song wouldn't play  
So we had to check out why it wasn't working  
It blew up in our face  
See?!  
This just proves your like MacGyver!  
You're not helping your case, Mixie!

**#156 No shouting "GRENADE!" unless there is one**  
I seriously thought it was a grenade  
I was in my room, just chilling  
When the twins came in  
Rumble slipped something into my hand and Frenzy whispered, "You have 76 seconds. It's a grenade, good luck."  
They then high tailed it out of there  
So of course I screamed and ran out of there  
I shouted, "GRENADE!" and ran all around base like the madwoman I was  
All the other cons freaked out  
But after five minutes of running around and not being blown up, I began to get supscious  
They later found out it was NOT a grenade  
I was put in the brig  
I seriously _did_ think it was a greande!  
But it turns out it was just a potato...

**#157 Do not let the twins help you pack**  
I was going away to Summer camp  
Why, Soundwave, why?!  
Soundwave: Answer: would cause chaos and trouble. And are annoying  
Me: *hurt* It was a rhetorical question! Thanks a lot, Soundwave!  
*goes into corner and cries*  
Skywarp: Uh, Storm?  
Me: *sulk*  
Skywarp: Aren't you gonna finish the rule?  
Me: I'm too depressed  
Skywarp: *vent* Fine. Looks like I'll have to do this  
Tammi was sent away to Summer camp  
The twins decided she needed help  
Despite her protests  
While packing her suitcase, they found her under coverings  
They asked what the coverings were  
I have never seen a human go so red in the face

**#158 No bringing Rumble and Frenzy to summer camp**  
Turns out I had some stowaways  
Their excuses were pathetic  
Soundwave sent you my foot  
Let's just say the experience was...interesting  
The twins were nicknamed "Prank Kings"  
I was dubbed, "Crazy Girl"  
I've never been so glad to see base  
How glad, you ask?  
So glad that when I saw Skywarp (one of the 'cons I missed) I tackled him and yelled, "I love you!"  
Yet another sanity test

**#159 Dear Autobots, if you ask me a question, I will respond with a smartaleck answer**  
The Autobots had captured Soundwave and the Cassetteicons  
Oh yeah  
And me  
The ONE time Rumble and Frenzy covince me to go on a scouting mission  
It'll be fun, they said  
The Autobots'll never come, they said  
Soundwave will protect us, they said  
LIARS! BOTH OF YOU!  
Anyway, the Autobots were interrogating me  
A guy named Slingshot and another dude named Bluestreak were doing it  
My awesomeness had apparently not been heard of from them before because they thought I was a neutral who the Decepticons had somehow convinced to join them  
Wait...  
That is how it happened  
Err, anyway...  
Slingshot asked, "Why'd ya join the Decepticons?"  
So Bluestreak added, "Yeah, why'd you join the darkside?"  
Which made me respond, "They offered me cookies."  
Later, Slingshot, Bluestreak and some other Autobots were captured  
And I got guard duty  
So I was all like, "Welcome to the darkside. We lied about the cookies."  
Ya'll have been PWNED!

**#160 No doing experiments with the Constructicons**  
What?  
I was bored!  
Besides, the Constructicons asked for my help  
They were making a...I don't actually _know_ what they were making  
But it backfired, whatever it was  
It turned everyone on base (excluding the Constructicons and me) into (brace yourself)...FEMMES  
You read that right  
It turned all the Decepticons into their opposite gender  
And, well, ALL of them are mechs  
Rumble and Frenzy instantly somehow knew I had something to do with it  
Which meant I had to run for my life  
Luckily, the 'cons soon had to go to battle  
The Decepticons didn't win  
Nor did the Autobots  
The 'bots were too busy laughing  
Don't worry, we got them back  
Err, well, we're still working on the antidote  
Mixmaster: But they should be back by the next set of rules  
Me: *looks at mangled contraption* I hope...

**Wheeliefan101: *sleeping***

**First Aid: *bored* -_-**

**Wheeliefan101: *still sleeping***

**First Aid: *pokes 101***

**Wheeliefan101: ~IT'LL BE JUST LIKE STARTING OVER!~**

**First Aid: WHAT THE % $*! DX *jumps back***

**Wheeliefan101: ~Take a trip somewhere far away, we'll be together all alone again!~**

**First Aid: .~_.^ *blinks***

**Wheeliefan101: *record scratch* Ew...I can't believe I implied that... ):s**

**R&R, tell me if there's a song you want to be done in the disclaimer! :D**


	17. PAR-tay failures

**Wheeliefan101: I own transformers!**

Sideswipe: Not

Wheeliefan101: Err, I DO own transformers!

Sideswipe: Not

Wheeliefan101: *madly jumps up and down in annoyance* I do! I do! I do!

Sideswipe: Not

Wheeliefan101: Quit ruining my dreams! D,: *runs away crying*

Sideswipe: Ignore the crazy person. As I was saying, Wheeliefan101 does NOT intend this for offense or own transformers (thank goodness)

Chapter 17: PAR-tay failures

**#161 No yelling at a disembodied voice**  
I hear this song a lot when the Decepticons destroy something  
Frankly, it was quite annoying  
I asked Rumble and Frenzy what it was  
They told me "Instruments of Destruction"  
I asked how to stop it  
They had no idea  
I eventually got fed up with it  
So I yelled, "BE QUIET, YA STUPID INSTRUMENTS OF DESTRUCTION!"  
I finally got silence  
Wonderful silence  
Right before a piano fell on me  
And the song played again  
Uuuugggggggg

**#162 No konga lines**  
The Decepticons were celebrating some Cybertronian holiday  
Rumble and Frenzy tried to explain it to me  
I still have no idea what it was  
Anyway, we decided to celebrate  
With a KONGA LINE  
It was actually pretty fun  
Well, until _somebody_ *coughEnemycough* decided to shoot spitballs at us from the rafters  
The Decepticons thought it was each other  
So they yelled at each other  
Which lead to chaos  
Let's just say it didn't end well  
Soundwave, Rumble, Frenzy, Laserbeak, Buzzsaw, Ratbat, Ravage, and I went to hunt down Enemy since we had been (forced to be) living with him the longest, we could TELL it was him  
Never seen Enemy disappear so fast  
We're still looking for him  
Oh! There he goes now!  
*runs after Enemy*  
ENEMY! GET BACK HERE!

**#163 No turning on the anti-gravity**  
It's the twins who did it  
They thought it would be "such a good prank"  
Good prank my foot  
R 'n' F forgot _one_ little thing when they turned on the anti-gravity  
We were in there too  
But unfortunately for us, we were lighter, being the on the smaller side (I was in my human mode)  
Which meant we got up on the ceiling first  
Which _also_ meant the bigger 'cons came up later  
...flatening us

Oh, BTW, I'm typing this on the ceiling because we still haven't FIXED THE DARN ANTI-GRAVITY!

**#164 No more boss battles**  
I was totally beating R 'n' F in video game boss battles  
And they were being sore losers  
They said there was no way I could beat a boss in real life like they did  
So I got cocky and said I totally could  
They dared me to actually do it  
...me and my big mouth  
I actually challenged _OPTIMUS PRIME_ to a battle  
When I can hardly hit the broad side of a barn  
You can imagine how it went  
In the end, Optimus won and I was curled up in a tight little ball, rocking back and forth while whimpering  
Skywarp asked (from a distance, in case I was mentally unstable) if I was okay  
Rumble and Frenzy came over to check on me  
When they asked how I was doing, I cried, "I WANT MY MOMMY!"  
So of _course_ they said I was alright  
Meanies...

**#165 Stuffed animals are not for ammo**  
Rumble, Frenzy and I made these epic weapons  
And we shot (brace yourself) STUFFED ANIMALS!  
We shot at multiple passing Decepticons  
Thundercracker was the one who fought back  
He chucked hard toys at us  
...cheater...

**#166 Highlighters are for highlighting, not coloring**  
Rumble and Frenzy were bored  
Which meant they got _me_ bored  
Unfortunately for me, the cassette brothers found fun by target practice  
Which I could not do  
It's not that I'm a bad shot, but, well, I'm a bad shot  
So I went off to annoy Soundwave  
He gave me a pack of highlighters and a piece of paper  
And then he left me  
All alone  
Which meant I had to make fun by myself  
So instead of doodling on the paper like I should've, I found a recharging Thundercracker  
And I highlighted his entire paintjob  
Needless to say, he was very unhappy  
And while the high-five from the twins on a job well done was nice, being kicked like a football twenty thousand feet into the air via Thundercracker's pede still hurts  
Not to mention he glows in the dark  
I SO did NOT know they were glow in the dark highlighters  
Blame Soundwave  
Thundercracker is no longer allowed to go on night stealth missions

**#167 No tackling new recruits**  
What?  
I'm tired of always spending time with the short guys! (No offense, cassetticons)  
So when a new recruits came—R 'n' F told me about him coming (big mistake!)—of _course_ I had to jump on him!  
But of course he still got scared of me  
And leaked some transmission fluid  
Heh heh  
The guy still runs away when he sees me  
Whoops?

**#168 When the Constructicons are experimenting, do not get anywhere near them**  
I was taking Ravage to the med-bay, while receiving many scratches and bites  
You're WELCOME, Soundwave  
Getting me to do your dirty work for you...  
And thank you Rumble and Frenzy for not helping  
At all!  
Err, anyway...  
The med-bay was right next to the room the Constructicons were in (that can't be a coincidence)  
Unfortunately for Ravage and me, their invention worked  
And they were looking for test subjects  
So we both scrambled, looking for hiding places  
But poor Ravage, a black cyber-cat is much easier to spot than an itsy-bitsy human  
I actually kinda feel sorry for the cassetticon  
Anyway, Ravage was the guniea pig  
And when he came back, he was...different  
He was white, was on the computer all the time, and talked in text  
Also, he was, quite frankly, THE MOST SLAGGING ANNOYING THING SINCE COMMERCIALS!  
CHANGE HIM BACK!  
JUST CHANGE HIM BACK!

**#169 No real life Angry Birds**  
R 'n' F were playing Angry Birds  
And they set a new world record  
Soundwave finally told them to stop playing on that game and actually DO something  
So they dragged me outside to capture a bunch of birds  
I didn't know why, but I had learned it was sometimes best not to question the twins  
They stole a slingshot, got some pigs from a farm then began the game  
As you can imagine, it did not go over too well  
They gave a whole new definiton to ANGRY birds

**#170 An apple a day keeps the doctor away...if well aimed**  
Um, yes, well  
You see, the twins and I came up with plan Scorpian Sting  
What does it have to do with Scorpians and/or Stings?  
Well...nothing, really  
It just sounded cool  
Anyway, plan Scorpian Sting was going as planned (unfortunately, I can't tell you of its awesomeness because Hook won't let me unless any others get any ideas)  
But uh-oh!  
Something happened, causing something else to NOT happen, making the something that was supposed to happen instead making something else happen  
And during that time, I was eating an apple  
Hook came looking for me  
Worst yet, it was _CHECK UP TIME_ (insert lightning from thunderstorm and horror movie scream)  
So I ran  
Unfortunately, my legs are WAY shorter than Hook's in _both_ modes (and the hallways were WAY too narrow for vehicle mode)  
He had me cornered  
There was no escape  
So I weighed my options (which weren't too good)  
Deciding I had better things to do that night then die, I chucked my apple at him  
Let's just say the aftermath was not pretty  
Or anything short of colorful  
In short, it was bad

**Wheeliefan101: (in closet) *sniff sniff* Sideswipe's so mean, I need to blame more stuff on him...oh, hi! Didn't see you there. Anyway, you know, R&R, and blame stuff and Sideswipe and...stuff...**

**Oh, before I forget, you know the new recruit? Well someone will get to name him! :D All you have to do is answer this: ****_What happened to Sparkplug's wife?_**

**Whoever comes up with the most ****creative**** answer will get to name him! Also, a mystery judge will be judging with me! Send by PMs or reviews! :D**

**UWMA (until we meet again)**


	18. Everyday oddities

**Sentinel Prime and Optimus Prime: *currently in epic battle***

Sentinel: Who would you be without me?!

Optimus: Time to find out-

Wheeliefan101: ~Tell me who am I, without you by my side?~

Optimus and Sentinel: .~_.^?

Wheeliefan101: ~What I know, I can do!~

Sentinel: Shall I dispose of it?

Optimus: *nods* Indeed

Sentinel: *raises foot to crush me*

Wheeliefan101: Wait!  
Wheeliefan101doesn'towntransformersorintendthisfor offense! Youcan'thurtme!

Sentinel: Yeah, right *steps on me* ...  
YEEEEE-OW!

Wheeliefan101: Ha ha! The power of the disclaimer has saved me! :D

Sentinel: By Alpha Trion's beard, does the disclaimer really save people?!

Wheeliefan101: Lol, no, it was just this huge shield I stole from an alternate you! }:)

TFA Sentinel: *chases me* GET BACK HERE!

Wheeliefan101: NNNNEEEEVVVVEEEERRRR!

**Oh, hey, before I forget, WE HAVE A WINNER! (why do you think this chapter took me so long?) And, I must say, there was a lot of struggling to decide who would win. Not oh-no-who-ever-shall-we-pick kind of struggling. More like stuck-in-a-sarlacc-pit-with-Jabba-the-Hut-sitting- on-you-covered-in-quicksand struggling. So yeah. Without further adoo, the winner is-**

***suddenly cuts to film***

Chapter 18: Everyday oddities

**#171 We don not have a Rec. room, we have a Wreck room**  
As you may have noticed, I have mentioned (somewhere) in the rules that we had a Wreck room  
Most people have a Rec. room  
The Decepticons get a Wreck room  
You see, instead of doing the rec.-y things people do in a rec. room, we wreck our Wreck room  
Whether it's an argument with the twins (ends up in a fight with R 'n' F), the twins standing up for Soundwave and ready to pulverize anyone who dares to disagree (ends up in a fight with R 'n' F), or just deciding what we want to do (also ends up with a fight)  
I can't even BEGIN to tell you the THOUSANDS of times we have tried to repair that Wreck room (The Constructicons, me, neat freaks/people who don't want our room to look like junk)  
Only for it to get messed up again  
Woe is our futile cleaning skills

**#172 No traveling across different dimensions**  
That's right, Vector Prime, I'm looking at you!  
The twins and I were perfectly happy, not knowing you existed  
You just HAD to crash onto our base, didn't you?  
And all those other Decepticons just HAD to follow you  
Gosh, Thunderblast was annoying  
But Starscream FINALLY got a body big enough for his ego  
Although I think our Starscream got ideas with that crown  
Thundercracker glitched when he saw...well...Thundercracker  
How could TC get that accent?!  
How?!  
Anyway, the other dimension Megatron tried to take over our Decepticon band  
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!  
As if!  
We totally whooped them  
But when the Autobots came, it got messy  
Only by my charms, and Rumble and Frenzy's lies, did we convince the Autobots to leave  
Well...we convinced them to leave...but they don't know exactly how to leave  
Excuse me, *bangs head on wall repeatedly*

**#173 Energon cookies? Bad idea**  
The Constructicons made the most wonderful/terrible thing since silly string:  
Energon cookies  
Now the Decepticons know why I keep ranting about how wonderful cookies are  
And why I nearly took Breakdown's helm off when he took away my cookie—thought it was a spy robot sent by the Autobots  
_Somebody_'s been watching too much Dispicable Me!~  
Anyway, the twins were the first guniea pigs to try it  
They approved of it  
Soon, almost all Cybertronians (and half Cybertronians) on base had energon cookies  
Unfortunately, _some_ 'cons got greedy  
Ravage stole my cookie :(  
And then he texted to his friends that he had stole my cookie  
They all laughed at me  
Mean cyber-cat...

**#174 Stay away from space bridges**  
Megatron had brought Soundwave, the casseticons (and me), the seekers, and the Constructicons to a battle where Megzy was gonna steal the planet's moon  
Or something like that  
And in case you're wondering, he HAS tried to steal the sun  
Didn't work out too well (like all of his other "brilliant" schemes)  
Anyway, the twins and I were playing close to where Megatron had built a space bridge  
And since the Autobots hadn't shown up yet, I could be my awesome human self  
We were playing a dare game, you see, and I had currently made an EPIC dare  
Kick Megatron and make a run for it  
Did NOT end too well for R 'n' F  
My ending wasn't so peachy either  
I nearly died laughing XD  
But then the cassette brothers came up with good payback  
I had to walk onto the space bridge and back  
Lemme tell ya, that space bridge was scary with a capital "AAAAHHHHH!"  
But I couldn't back down  
So I did it  
Unfortunately for me, Bonecrusher accidently hit the switch  
The switch that turned on the space bridge  
The switch that made me space bridge through space  
The switch that flipped my whole life upside down and made me leave my stomach back on Earth  
When I arrived on Cybertron, everything was spinning and I was swaying more than a drunk sailor on a seesaw  
And guess what  
Shockwave was ALSO there!  
After upchucking about forty times, I noticed Shockwave staring at me  
So I stared back  
And we stayed like that for a while  
Until Shockwave noticed my puke on the floor  
He said some very confusing things, and then told me he was going to tell Megatron on me  
Tattletale  
So I had to do everything in my power to stop him  
One thing led to another and soon we were in a chase  
Shockwave being the chasER, me being the chasEE  
Who knew ol' Shocky could be so much fun?

**#175 Alternate realities are not, I repeat not a good idea**  
Heh heh  
So, you remember when Vector Prime came for a visit?  
Yeah, well the twins and I wondered if there were OTHER alterante universe transformers  
And the Constructicons built something that made alternate universe transformers show up  
This dude named Side Burn came  
And he chased me around all day because I was a little red sports car  
Then Sky-byte came  
Kind of weird  
Said he worked for Megatron but he was a Predacon  
*shrug*  
Next was Rattrap  
REALLY annoying  
Always complained  
Then came Thrust  
Weird drone guy  
Poor our Thrust  
He glitched  
...and crashed  
At the same time  
Oh, and let's not forget Alpha Q  
VERY creepy  
So was Cyclonus  
He kept laughing  
...and shooting at us  
...even though we were on his side  
Anyway, we also met Knock out, the vain medic  
He was scary  
Especially since he wanted to do surdgery on some of us  
Then came Lugnut, who served the "GLORIOUS Megatron"  
Talk about a fanboy  
Erm, yes, right  
Where were we?  
Oh yeah  
Next came Soundwave  
He was like our Soundwave  
Only the complete opposite  
He came to take Ravage back  
So he took our texting Ravage and replaced him with Old Ravage  
Old Ravage bit me  
I miss the txting Ravage :(

**#176 No trying to persuade the new recruit to do your bidding**  
You remember the new recruit  
BrightSteel?  
Well, Rumble, Frenzy and I had a plan  
Which shall remain anonymous to keep the author's life safe  
But there was a small bug  
We had to get someone else to do this certain part which will also remain anonymous to keep the author safe  
We thought it would be easy to manipulate the newbie  
Turns out we were wrong  
Who knew he was mad at me because I'm a crazy femme just like his sister that he had recently escaped?  
And that he know hates my guts?  
Or that he was a sniper and could tell our emotions just by looking at our faces?  
We were made his target for the next six weeks  
Heh heh...my bad

**#177 I am****_ not_**** a medic, I never have****_ been_**** a medic, I never ****_will be_**** a medic, so quit asking!**  
HOOK  
Bonecrusher came in with some wires criss crossed  
And it was painful  
But Hook couldn't fix it since it was in places his giant servos couldn't reach  
So he called me in  
Because lucky me!  
I'm the smallest! (sometimes being a human—err, half humam—stinks)  
When he called me in, he told me I had to crawl into Bonecrusher and fix some wires  
I, of course, made a break for it  
The Constructicons, of course, stopped my escape  
So I had no choice  
But I still wasn't too keen on going inside Bonecrusher  
Especially considering his name  
Sucking up all my courage, knowing I had to do what I had to do, I screamed and ran around in circles  
Until the Constructicons FORCED me inside Bonecrusher  
Meanies...  
Anyway, Hook instructed me to do stuff and I did them  
And it was all well  
Up until I accidently hit a sensitive wire  
That caused Bonecrusher to laugh (that's right, I _tickled_ him)  
Which made me fly into _another_ wire  
That just happened to be his transforming wire  
And that caused him to transform  
Man, I have never scrambled out of a giant alien robot so fast  
Ran right over the D-twins (sorry guys)

**#178 When someone says you don't want to know, you don't want to know**  
I walled into my room after a grueling day of school  
...and found Rumble, Frenzy, Sqwaukbox, Buzzsaw, and Enemy upside down, tied to my ceiling with silly string  
Frenzy tried to tell me, "You don't want to know."  
But I still pressured them to tell me  
So R, F 'n' E told me what happened  
I ran out of there screaming  
*shivers*  
I am mentally scarred for life

**#179 When someone runs past you, saying "I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead", or is cackling like a maniac, either:**  
A. Run with them, but make sure to run with ahead of them  
B. Hide somewhere were no one will find you or  
C. All of the above  
Why not just stay where you are? Especially if you did nothing wrong, you ask?  
Because you'll get blamed anyway, that's why  
I know, life's so unfair  
But still  
Who said life was going to be easy?  
Rumble, Frenzy and I were just chilling, fighting with each other  
When Skywarp ran past  
We thought nothing of it and kept wrestling  
But a pink Starscream soon ran after Warpie  
He thought we were in on it so we ALSO got put in the brig  
Thanks a lot, Sky

**#180 Rumble and Frenzy are the only ones allowed to break dance**  
Mainly because they're the only ones who can actually DO it  
They can breakdance like no one's business  
Me?  
I put the BREAK in break dance  
I cannot tell you the amount of bones I've broken in my attempts to try and break dance

**Wheeliefan101: Lol, are you hating me right now? XD**

**Anyway, the real winner is...**

**TINYTERROR! **

**(see if you can spot the OC)**

**And the awesome and oh-so mysterious judges are: Ray Strax, Sophia901, Graceful-Kuja, Notramjet97 and Meeeeeeee!**

**Skywarp: they already knew you were a judge**

**Wheeliefan101: Oh yeah...*shrug* R&R and please don't pelt me with marshmellows! I hate marshmellows...**


	19. Rickety relationships

**Wheeliefan101: Ah, time to check my reviews...*opens door to reviews***

**Door: *spits out a million marshmellows***

**Wheeliefan101: GAAAH! *futiley puts up arms in attempt to shield herself* MUST. STOP. MARSHMELLOWS! *slams door shut* *deeps breaths***

**Skywarp: *walks by* *sees me* .~_.^?**

**Wheeliefan101: Do NOT go in there! D8**

**Motormaster: *comes in with marshmellow bag* **

**Wheeliefan101: NOOOOOOO! WHEELIEFAN101DOESNOTOWNTRANSFORMERSORINTENDTHISFOR OFFENSE! *runs away* NOT THE MAAAARRRRRSSSSSSHHHHHMMMMEEELLLLOOOOOOWWWWSSSS! DX**

**Motormaster: What's her problem?**

**Skywarp: *shrug***

**Motormaster: *eats marshmellow* =3**

Chapter 19: Rickety relationships

**#181 Mad Libs are banned**  
The Decepticons were attacking a city  
There was a store nearby  
That happened to have Mad libs  
So I went in and bought one  
But since the D-cons wouldn't approve of me showing my face where the Autobots could locate me, I put a paper sack over my head  
So undignifying  
Err, anyway  
I thought the Mad libs would be fun  
So I gathered all the 'cons and told them we were gonna play a game  
They, of course, agreed  
Unfortunately, it happened to be the Autobot one  
Seriously, store, seriously?  
I know they always save the town and stuff but really?  
Whatever  
Anyway, the Decepticons-once hearing it was AUTOBOT-came up with really...nasueating things  
They chose words that would make the bravest heart tremble  
Creepy, dudes, creepy  
And then there was one for the Decepticons  
By then, I had given up saying the names of them  
So they chose the normal words that would give you nightmares  
Which made them look bad when I read it out loud  
Of _course_ they blamed me!  
Anyway, Rumble, Frenzy, and Enemy ganged up and beat me up  
T.T ow...

**#182 Implying that I like any Autobots is dangerous to both your health and mine**  
I was at school  
In the cafeteria  
Surrounded by the annoying pests that are my classmates  
They were playing the "This person likes you" game  
I, of course, was not participating in such meaningless banter  
But did that stop them from involving me?  
_Nooooooooo_  
At first, it was just with humans  
E.g.:  
Jason likes Tammi  
Tammi wants to ask Chad out  
I chose to ignore their inaccurate comments  
Until they added Autobots  
I am SO going to get Freddy  
Do you know what he said?  
He said, and this is a direct quote, "Tammi's been dating Bumblebee!"  
OH. MY. GOSH.  
To make matters worse, Laserbeak heard them and started attacking ME  
He also called for back up (tattletale), which caused the trouble twins to come in and beat me up  
It took seven hours to convince them I WASN'T a traitor  
Psht...dating Bumblebee  
*shudders*  
As if!

**#183 No singing the Jellybean Song**  
~This is the jellybean song  
~This is the song about jelly-beans!  
~Jellybeans is what this song is about  
~And here is how it goes:  
**repeat**  
Me, Enemy, Rumble, Frenzy, and Squawktalk sang that song for FIVE HOURS STRAIGHT!  
I'm pretty sure we _would_ have gone on longer, but Bonecrusher yelled at us to shut our traps, Mixmaster got Beastbox to sit on us (traitor!), and Hook threatened to rip out our vocal processors  
Some people have no taste  
Oh well  
Guess we'll just have to improvise  
~This is the song that never ends!...

**#184 No quoting the Iron Giant**  
NO FAIR!  
THE IRON GIANT IS AWESOME!  
"Can you talk? You know, words? Blah, blah, blah, like that? Can you do that, blah, blah, blah?"  
"Blah, blah, blah."  
"Well, you get the idea, anyway."  
_Another_ new recruit had shown up  
For some reason, I didn't talk to him  
And he had been recently watching "Earth movies"  
So he asked if I could talk  
I repeated blah blah blah  
You get the idea  
"Welcome to downtown Coolsville! Population: us."  
Rumble when I asked what in the world we were doing a cave  
That helps so much -_-  
"You have a problem with arts and crafts, little man?"  
"He's a giant robot, it's a little undignifying."  
Astrotrain and me when I asked why he was making Trypticon make a giant fort out of popsicle sticks and super glue  
I tried to explain Trypticon's best intrest  
Astrotrain was not amused  
I could tell by the way he ordered Trypticon to step on me  
"It's bad to kill. Guns kill. And you don't have to be a gun. You are what you choose to be. You choose. Choose."  
Me to Blades when his blaster was aimed at me  
He chose to shoot me -_-  
"Hey, big metal guy! I got food here for ya! Metal! Crunchy, delicious metal! Come and get it!"  
Me talking about the D-con twins awhen Grimlock was coming to get us  
That dinobot was_ MAD_  
Let's just say it was an incident with a chainsaw, glitter, and frozen turkey

**#185 Do NOT, I repeat do ****_NOT_**** provoke ****_ANYONE_********to their gladiator mode**  
The twins dared me to do it  
In the middle of a Decepticon party  
They were all staring at me  
WITH THEIR EYES!-err, optics  
So of course I couldn't back down!  
The others would never let me hear the end of it!  
Anyway, I chose the only gladiator I could think of:  
Sideswipe  
He seemed to be nicer than his twin Sunstreaker  
So, using some awesome gadgets the Constructicons built me, I irritated Sideswipe to gladiator mode  
Unfortunately, it was a package deal  
So I had BOTH gladiator twins after me  
VERY. SCARY.  
And dangerous to my health  
I'll save you the gory details and just tell you that I had spent a very long time in the med-bay, thinking, "I am NEVER gonna do that again."

**#186 Let's not get into the conversation 'bout who's weaker**  
Okay  
Rumble, Frenzy and I sometimes get into a fight about who's stronger  
Which usually ends up in many injuries on BOTH sides of the fight  
Unfortunately, things got messy when Enemy joined our argument  
The twins and I _probably_ could have worked things out on our own  
But no  
Enemy just HAD to prove they were stronger  
He stated, "I can _prove_ you're weaker!"  
And I was all like, "Nuh-uh!"  
Then he punched me!  
Very hard!  
And I was in my human mode!  
So I bruised!  
Which led to Enemy and me rolling on the ground, fighting  
Thundercracker finally broke us up, trying to be the mature adult  
By break us up, I mean he clunked our heads together  
Might I add, OW!

**#187 Christmas parties are no longer allowed**  
Aw! *pout*  
But Christmas is my favorite holiday!  
Oh well  
Anyway, the reason behind this rule is because...  
...well...  
I don't want to say it was disaster or anything...but...  
It was a disaster  
The (way too big) Christmas tree fell on Starscream  
The reindeer kicked Megatron  
Santa got stuck in the chimney  
Soundwave burnt the cookies  
Ramjet was set on fire  
Thrust was buried alive in the snow  
Frenzy went a _little_ overboard on the ice maker  
Okay  
Maybe a LOT overboard (now you know how Thrust was buried)  
Enemy and Rumble disentigrated the turkey  
Kremezeke _somehow_ came back and blew out all our electric appliances  
Dirge stepped on all the presents  
Starscream scared away the carolers (with his singing)  
And Hook and me somehow were caught under the mistletoe  
*Shivers*  
Although, I'm still trying to figure out how Keremezeke came back...

**#188 No quoting Atlantis**  
Strange as it is,_ I_ actually made this rule  
Because ya'll are using the quotes against me! DX  
"Smeone needs to talk to that girl."  
"I will do it!"  
"Someone with good people skills."  
"I will do it!"  
"Someone who won't scare her away."  
"I volunteer!"  
"Someone who can speak the language."  
"For the good of the mission, I will go!"  
"Good man, Thatch. Thanks for volunteering."  
Rumble and Frenzy trying to figure out who would go  
Enemy, trying to go  
Wildrider, being forced to go  
Me, being the person they were talking about, when I was trying to communicate to a squirrel  
"Okay, here's the plan. We're gonna come in low and fast and take 'em by surprise."  
"I got news for you, Milo. Rourke is never surprised and he's got a lot of guns."  
"Great. Well, do you have any suggestions?"  
"Yeah, don't get shot!"  
Me and Dirge when discussing battle plans  
The new recruit, coming up with a better plan  
Therefor, destroying my idea like a duck being shot out of the sky  
Meanies...

**#189 The following excuses are not to be made**  
For YOUR saftey  
"*crosses arms or stares blankly at accuser* I have no idea what you're talking about."  
Me, when Skywarp accused me of stealing his waxer  
That just made him MORE suspcious  
Which ended up with me in the brig  
Why do you even NEED a waxer?!  
Plain unnatural!  
"Aliens abducted my report."  
"And where are these 'aliens'?"  
"*spots me* *big gasp* There she is! Give my report back!"  
That was Rumbles excuse for not having his report  
Astrotrain, however, didn't buy it  
And unfortunately for me, I happened to walk in at that moment  
So Rumble blamed me  
Then the two D-con twins beat me up  
But when they (the other guys) found out it had been a lie, they got Bruticus to beat THEM up  
Ha ha!  
Justice has been served!  
"I _would_ have done monitor duty but I came down with a bad case of cosmic rust."  
Me when explaining why I didn't show up for monitor duty  
The Decepticons turned into a panicking frenzy  
...how was I supposed to know it was a deadly disease?!  
Acuser(s): You lied to me (us)?!  
Acusee: And you believed me?!  
That was the twins when I had told them Vortex kept his high grade in Breakdown's hood  
...and they took me seriously  
Very awkward for Breakdown...  
Although you have to admit, the twins were pretty dim-witted to believe me  
*hears snickering*  
*sigh* I just insulted myself, didn't I?  
*snickering turns into laughing*  
QUIT LAUGHING!  
IT'S NOT FUNNY!

**#190 No renacting famous battles with foods**  
I had a history project  
To renact a famous battle  
Unfortunately for me, the twins noticed my head banging and mubling how cruel the world was and asked what was wrong  
And I, in a moment of desperation and stupidity, told them my homework  
They agreed  
Why did you have to agree, why?!  
Oh well  
Anyway, we renacted the civil war  
...with custard pies and whip cream  
Oh, and chocolate syrup  
It all went well (even though the british-Rumble and Frenzy-was pounding the putty out of the US-me and Enemy) until certain _civilians_ got involved  
Who the heck goes to the training room in the middle of the day, anyway?!  
Seekers are just plain weird  
Anyway, we suffered heavy casualties  
Skywarp: had his joints locked up with the chocolate syrup oozing into his circutry  
Thundercracker: got whip cream in the optic and accidently took out Enemy  
Starscream: slipped on the pies and fell on Enemy (poor guy)  
Acid storm: got a waffle to the face  
...yeah  
I don't really know how that happened either  
But I got an F on it -_-  
Personally, I think it's because Ravage refused to play the tape, even though it was HIM who we had recorded it on  
...meanie

**Wheeliefan101: *in cloak* The end...it is coming soon...**

**Acid Storm: You humans are so weird... D:**

**Wheeliefan101: OH! And the Jellybean song? It's mine! MIIIIINE! It took me a very long time to make!**

**Acid Storm: It took you five minutes...**

**Wheeliefan101: That's a very long time for me! DX**

**Acid Storm: Okay! Okay! Calm down...Primus!**

**Wheeliefan101: Plz review! *looks at marshmellows they are currently standing in* (and hopefully you won't pelt me with marshmellows)**

**Acid Storm: Hey, look at the bright side! At least they didn't catch fire!**

**Singe/Scorch: *comes in with his flamethrower* RRRREEEEEEEEEVNGE! *cackles maniclly***

**Wheeliefan101: AGH! I'M ON FIRE! SWEET MERCY! HELP! STOP DROP AND DIE! I'M ON FFIIIIIIIIIIIRE! *runs around in panicky circles, increasing fire***

**Acid Storm: Primus...*facepalm***


	20. The grand finale

**Wheeliefan101: *appears in puff of smoke with cape* Ta-da! *cough cough* Stupid special effects! Ahem, anyway, THE ****_GREAT _****AND ****_POWERFUL_**** WHEELIEFAN101 HAS RETURNED!**

**Random OC: Oh, yay *rolls optics* How wonderful for you to grace us with your ****_oh-so _****humble prescence**

**Wheeliefan101: You're welcome :D**

**Random OC: *facepalm* You still owe me for that Poker game...**

**Wheeliefan101: Whatever. Anyway, if you've seen the chapter name, it says "Grand Finale". *gasp* What does this mean? It means, sadly, Double Trouble is going to end**

**Random OC: What?! I get on here for the ****_first time ever_**** and then you end it?!**

**Wheeliefan101: Well *awkward cough* pretty much, yeah**

**Random OC: I can't believe you!**

**Wheeliefan101: Not many can. Wheeliefan101 does not own transformers or intend this for offense**

**Random OC: *begins to pelt me with marshmellows* DIE!**

**Wheeliefan101: NOOOOOOO! *ducks under table* Oh, thanks to all those people who put me out in the last chapter :D I'd still be on fire if it weren't for you **

**I tried to put as much awesomeness in this as I could! Hope you enjoy!~**

Chapter 20: The grand finale

**#191 Going to the pool is a very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very-**  
Long haul: Are you done yet?  
Me: Hold on, I have a few more  
**-very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very-**  
Scavanger: JUST GET ON WITH IT! *chucks UAPVPO (unidentified and probably very painful object) at me*  
Me: Meep! *ducks*  
**-bad idea**  
Well...  
Technicaly, we didn't go to a "pool"  
They permanently banned us from ever going there  
Something about turning the pool yellow...  
*casts glance to Rumble and Frenzy*  
Oh I wonder who ever could have done it  
Anyway, Soundwave instead took the Cassetticons (and me) to a big, uninhabitated lake  
So we did all sort of stupid stunts into the pool  
Well...  
The others did  
I mainly just stayed in the water and drowned (still haven't learned to swim)  
But after being in the water for a long time, it started short circuiting the Cassetticons (Soundwave wouldn't go in the water...chicken)  
The twins were the first to short circuit  
Which meant they lost control of their body and started sinking  
I, unfortunately, decided to be a hero and transformed to my Cybertronian mode and dove in after them  
Not one of my brightest ideas  
Beacuse, you see, when I grabbed the twins, we ALL started sinking  
The Constructicons finally dug us out  
...five hours later  
Me  
Stuck with Rumble and Frenzy  
At the bottom of the ocean (well, lake)  
With no way to get out  
*shivers*  
I still have nightmares

**#192 Doing impersinations of other 'cons ain't too hot a idea, either**  
Some of the other Decepticons were gone off a mission  
To destroy the world, or somethin'  
Megzy's plans are all the same to me  
Anyway, we were _reeeaaaalllly_ bored  
Like, to death (Dirge was seriously writing his will)  
So I, being the brilliant genius I am, suggested we do impersinations  
...okay...  
Maybe I got a _little_ inspiration from Squawktalk  
Anyway, the Cassetticons were up first  
The twins and Enemy do a surprisingly good impersination of Soundwave (though I believe he would beg to differ)  
As does Laserbeak of Swindle  
And I don't like to brag, but I must say my imitation of each of the Constructicons would make even an echo jealous  
Although the real trouble began when Starscream started imitating Megzy  
His performance was so-so  
But guess who walked in!  
Megatron!  
And he wasn't too happy to begin with (his "brilliant" scheme had failed...again)  
I, of course, pointed to Star and blamed him  
Megatron, of course, believed me  
Or maybe he just wanted to use his punching bag  
Hard to tell with that guy...  
Anywho, Starscream lived up to his name, shooting off like a...uh...shooting star, screaming the whole way  
Or "exclaiming very loudly" as he informed me  
Psssshhht  
Yeah right

**#193 No more group hugs**  
Being the annoying and loveable being I am, I love to randomly shout "Group hug!"  
With that being said, I grab the 'cons closest to me in a group hug  
They, however, don't actually appreciate it that much  
Anyway, Rumble and Frenzy (and sometimes Enemy) like to tag along and group hug with me  
Unfortunately for us, the hugees usually shoot at us  
And hit us  
And smack us  
And yell at us  
And basically try to kill us  
But the other Decepticons decided to strike back  
Which means we should have hid in a bomb sheltered by heat seeking missle launchers with torpedoes hidden in electrum armor  
Anyway, while the twins and I were playing _Sorry!_ the Decepticons snuck up on us  
And gave us this giant, death grip hug  
Unfortunately for me, I was in my human mode  
Which meant Hook had to put me in a body cast  
Woe is me  
Rumble and Frenzy: You wanna hug?  
Me: }:(

**#194 Alarm clocks, piggy banks, rubber duckies, or anything similar to those items are not to be thrown at anyone's helm**  
You'll never guess what the Combiners thought of!  
A party/dance/just have a good time thingy :D  
We were all going (with more or less a very convincing gun to the back)  
So, not sure whether or not I would be in my Cybertronian mode or human mode, I decided to pick out clothes  
...in my house of horrors that doubles as my closet  
After chasing Ravage out with a fire exthingisher, I began hunting to find something flashy to wear  
Yeesh, some girls complain they had nothing to wear but I SERIOUSLY had nothing to wear  
Ravage had either torn up or used for target practice all my clothes  
So I had to toss out all my clothes, along with many other things  
Unfortunately, Rumble, Frenzy, Enemy, and Squawktalk decided to see how it was going  
I didn't notice them  
Which explains why I tossed out an alarm clock, that bounced off Frenzy's helm  
And why when I threw out my piggy bank, it hit Enemy in the optic  
Also why when I chucked my rubber ducky out, it slammed into Rumble's abdomen  
Oh yeah  
And there was Squawktalk with that anchor (I seriously don't know why that was in there...)  
This all caused sore feelings  
Which lead to much fighting  
But anyway, Motor Master came in to see how we were coming along,  
...and found that we were in the middle of a war  
So he slowly backed away, leaving us to stew in our own juices  
I'll save you the gory details, but let's just say, at the end of the day, it was more than the clothes in my closet torn

**#195 Pushing people off things is not advised**  
Especially if it's ME that you're pushing off  
That's Skywarps thing  
_The Cracker has joined the chatroom_  
Wait, what?  
The Cracker: Actually, Skywarp only pushes people off stairs  
Me: What the hay is going on?  
_Dynamic Duo of Destruction has joined the chatroom_  
Me: What the huh?!  
Dynamic Duo of Destruction: To answer your question "what the hay is going on", you're doing the rules  
Me: What?!  
_MacGyver's Crew has joined the chatroom_  
MacGyver's Crew: Have you guys seen Hook's wrench?  
The Cracker: Nope  
Dynamic Duo of Destruction: Ravage might be chewing on it  
_Ravage has joined the chatroom_  
Ravage: Am not!  
Dynamic Duo of Destruction: ...  
MacGyver's Crew: ...  
The Cracker: ...  
Me: How did you people all get on my computer?!  
Dynamic Duo of Destruction: ...since when could you type?  
The Cracker: And why did you use your actual name?  
Ravage: To answer your first question, I'm just awesome like that, and to answer your second question, my name's just that cool :3  
_Rainbow Fluffy Bunnies has joined the chatroom_  
Me: Where are all you people coming from?!  
_Da Wave has joined the chatroom_  
The Cracker: Da Wave?  
Dynamic Duo of Destruction: Yup. Our idea  
Rainbow Fluffy Bunnies: We shall all destroy the Autobots!  
_Pecker has joined the chatroom_  
Rainbow Fluffy Bunnies: Pecker?  
The Cracker: Pecker?  
Da Wave: Pecker?  
Dynamic Duo of Destruction: Pecker?  
MacGyver's Crew: Pecker?  
Me: Chatroom?! Why is there a chatroom? This is my computer!  
Pecker: Ju fyua  
Rainbow Fluffy Bunnies: Quit speaking this gibberish!  
Pecker: Qgsr fovvrtoxj/  
Ravage: He said, "Hi guys", then "What gibberish?"  
Dynamic Duo of Destruction: And how do you know?  
Ravage: I'm sitting right next to him  
Me: HEY! I HAVE A QUESTION!  
Da Wave: State question  
Me: Okay, WHO ARE YOU PEOPLE?!  
The Cracker: Thundercracker  
Pecker: Ksqrtvwzo  
Ravage: He's Laserbeak, I'm Ravage (duh)  
MacGyver's Crew: The Constructicons  
Dynamic Duo of Destruction: Rumble and Frenzy  
Da Wave: Soundwave  
Me: ?  
Fluffy Rainbow Bunnies: Megatron!  
Everybody: o.O?!  
Thundercracker: And now back to our regular rule  
Me: Wait, wha-  
Thundercracker: *kicks me off of wall that I happen to be on*  
Me: AH! *SPLAT!*  
Rumble and Frenzy: *points to me* Yeah, don't do that  
Me: *from ground with faceful of dirt* Thanks for the tip...

**#196 Brownies and slingshots do not mix**  
There I was  
Just randomly walking around for no real reason when BAM!  
A cookie exploded in my face!  
Followed by milk!  
I stood there, spluttering and stunned  
Then I heard the laughter  
The Seekers and the Cassetticons were shooting cookies (and milk) at me!  
The Seekers were laughing at my expression, until they got pummbled by cookies!  
Ha ha!  
Thus began the war between the cookies (Cassetticons...mainly the twins) and the milk...cartons (seekers)  
But I couldn't let myself go unavenged  
I had a cookie in the face!  
And a snickerdoodle at that!  
NOBODY SMACKS ME IN THE FACE WITH A SNICKERDOODLE!  
Except Megatron  
*Temporary flashback*  
Me: *grumbling under breath* Why the heck does Megatron want a mountain of cookies anyway? *to Megatron* Here's your cookies  
Megatron: *observing cookies* These are snickerdoodles!  
Me: Yeah...so?  
Megatron: So I wanted gingersnaps!  
Me: (AKA person who just baked seventy thousand snickerdoodle) AUG! *bangs head on cookie tray* I am NOT baking seventy thousand more cookies!  
Megatron: You dare to defiy me?!  
Me: *imitating in girly voice* Yes, I dare to defiy you  
Megatron: *chucks cookie at me*  
Me: Ow! *ducks for cover as more cookies fly* Okay, okay! I'll do it! Yeesh! *eventually gets buried alive in cookies*  
Temporary flash back end  
What was I doing?  
Oh yeah  
Anyway, I couldn't let this go unpunished  
So I got some super glue and a water gun  
Unfortunately, Ravage poked a hole in my plans  
He stole my gun  
Running away with it  
And not giving it back  
But fear not!  
For I improvised!  
And headed out in super cool suit like the spies in the movies wear  
I hid in the vents, waiting for the perfect moment  
Finally, it arrived  
Yelling a battle cry (which happened to just be "SOMETHING!"...even I can lose my creativity sometimes...okay...so I really was just too lazy to think up anything else, get off my case!), I launched my brownie through a slingshot  
...and missed entirely  
Luckily, I had plenty of brownie ammo  
Unfortunately, Trypticon doesn't like brownies being thrown at him  
Esepcially if they're covered in sticky chocolate icing  
Insert trip to the med bay  
Once out of the med bay, I went to the forest, ready to try again at anyone who dared to pass me  
Then that wonderful moment came when I heard footsteps  
...strangely enough, Omega Suprem doesn't like being pelted by desserts either  
Insert another trip to the med bay  
And a lecture  
And confiscation of my slingshot  
And having to scrape all the brownies off of Trypticon  
So undignifying -_-  
But the twins seemed to find my situation funny  
I'M GLAD SOMEONE IS HAVING FUN!  
AT THE EXPENSE OF MY MISERY!

**#197 Do not squirt condiments at other Decepticons**  
Totally Scavenger's fault  
He gave me the idea  
I was having trouble getting the mustard out of the bottle so I asked for his help  
He tried  
And failed  
And tried  
And failed  
So he lifted the bottle to his face to see if it was clogged up or something  
...and accidently squeezed the bottle  
It worked then...  
Ever seen a Constructicon in yellow?  
FUNNIEST. THING. EVER.  
Especially Scavenger's face  
XD  
Unfortunately, it gave me an idea  
The next morning, I wasn't up by my usual 9:00 so Rumble and Frenzy came in my room to "wake me up"  
Which is code name for throw me off my bed and into a tub of super cold water  
But when they came in, I wasn't there  
THEN, OUT OF NOWHERE, I JUMPED FROM THE CEILING AND SQUIRTED THEM WITH KETCHUP AND MUSTURD!  
Unfortunately, the twins came prepared  
Who the heck carries relish with them?!  
Seriously!  
After about three hours without the twins returning with me, Soundwave began to get suspcious  
But when he came into my room, he was splattered with mayonaise (again, 'Wave, that was an accident)  
We were currently in the middle of a condiment war  
Really, there was enough condiments there to make 700 hot dogs and a burger  
Soundwave finally seperated us  
When we wouldn't apologize to each other, he made us sit in time out  
I liked the brig better...

**#198 No speaking different languages**  
I found out I had a universal translator system!  
So I switched from English to German  
Nobody knew what I was saying for a week  
You may be saying, don't they have universal translator systems, too?  
They _do_  
But they couldn't figure out what language I was speaking!  
MWHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!  
But then, on the 10th day, Rumble and Frenzy came up to me and asked, "普遍的な翻訳者は面白いですね？"  
That shut me up real fast  
Two apparently can play at this game...  
They finally found out I was speaking German  
Soundwave took away my universal translator  
I am not very glücklich right now...

**#199 Cheerleading is not your thing**  
Well, technically, it's not _my_ thing  
You see, after an incident with a toaster oven, a quick cake mix, and a crazed fire hydrant (long story), my weapons were jammed up so I couldn't use them  
Not that I could ever really use them before...  
Anyway, without a means of defending myself, Soundwave wouldn't let me go to battle  
So I was stuck at base  
With Acid Storm  
Unfortunately, he didn't know me well enough to find out that I was part human so I was able to sneak away and go to battle  
Why was I risking my life to fight, you might ask?  
Because I wasn't fighting!  
I was going to be a cheerleader!  
The Cons were currently losing so I decided to cheer them on  
"Come on, D-cons, we can do it!  
"Beating these Auto-bums, there's nothing to it!  
"_Gooooooooooo_ Megatron!"  
Unfortunately, they didn't appreciate my optimism  
And even more unfortunately, I didn't realize this till later  
"Give me a 'w', gimme a 'i', 'n'! What does that spell? Win!"  
That's when the Seekers came after me  
But, not about to give up on my dream of becoming a world famous cheerer, I kept on cheerleading  
"Gimme a 'e', gimme a 's', gimme a 'c', 'a', 'p', 'e'! What does that spell? Something I should be doing right now!"  
So I hightailed it outta there, pom-poms and all  
Unluckily for me, the Seekers followed me  
"Being chased by Seekers is no fun!  
"In this skirt it's really hard to run!  
"_Goooooooooooooooo_ me!"  
Frankly, I was surprised three giant alien robots couldn't catch one tiny human  
But I'm not complaining!  
All the jumping and ducking I did might have helped...  
"Jump, duck, dodge and jump!  
"I'm doing all these things to save my rump!  
"_Booooooooooooooo_ Seeke-Ack!"  
That was when I accidently smacked into a tree limb  
It's kinda sad, really  
I get chased by three Decepticons, evade them-all while cheerleading-and then get beaten by a branch  
While I saw little birdies dance around (and three very mad Seekers looming above me), Rumble and Frenzy told me, "Well, at least you're outfit's cute."  
Yes, R&F, that makes me feel _so_ much better -_-

**#200 Never trust a Decepticon**  
So, I was just chilling in battle, making lousy, pathetic shots and potentially dying by everybody else's _decent_ shots  
We the Decepticons were fighting for an energy converter  
Which the Autobots currently had  
Because they had gotten to it first  
Strangely enough, the humans didn't want to give it to the Decepticons  
*shrug*  
The reason we needed it was because almost all of our energon  
Had something to do with almost all our energon rations exploding  
Hey, don't look at me like that  
I only had to do with _part_ of that  
Enemy and the Insecticons did the rest  
Anyway, we were desperate  
Aaaaaand we were losing  
Badly  
Very, _very_ badly  
And as I had said before, we were desperate  
That might explain why the twins grabbed me and pointed a blaster at my helm, threatening that if the Decepticons didn't get the energy convertor, I was a goner  
This time, they weren't joking  
There was something...different about them  
Unfortunately for me, the only two Autobots left were Sideswipe and Sunstreaker (the others went back for back up...and said the twins could handle things here...WE. ARE. PITIFUL!)  
You remember, the guys who _LAUGHED_ at me  
I am SOOOOO dead  
But Sunstreaker demanded to know why they should care if the Decepticons back stabbed one of their own  
Then Rumble told them that I wasn't really one of them  
And he wouldn't hesitate to kill me  
I, meanwhile, was giving them the glare of all glares  
While glaring I hissed, "I thought we were friends!"  
The two looked at me with emtionless optics...err...visors...err-ug! They just stared at me with emotionless whatever they had!  
And said five chilling words that would forever haunt me  
"There are no real friends."  
That was when the Autobots dumped the enrgy convertor at the Decepticons feet...err...pedes...whatever  
The point is that they surrendered the energy convertor!  
The twins shoved me forward, making me stumble fall into Sideswipe's arms  
When I saw those two faces, I only saw hatred  
Hatred for me  
I had never been..._hated_ by anyone before...  
Sunstreaker growled and pushed me forward, snarling, "You'd better be worth it, femme."  
I just stumbled again  
I was stunned, not quite sure if this was real or not  
It was all happening too fast  
We all headed to the Autobot base  
I had just been backstabbed  
By the very guys who I thought had been my friends  
They had betrayed me  
Wait...Autobot base?  
No more Decepticons?  
So I'm...free?

_Me: So here it is! Double Trouble is finally finished! Wah! DX *begans sobbing uncontrollably* *clutches Sunstreaker* WHY?! WHY?!_  
_Sunstreaker: Let go of me, FEMME_  
_Me: *pays no attention but lets go* *wiping tears away and blowing nose in tissue* Anyway, I hate to leave you guys on a negative note so I'm going to do this *produces giant hammer like you use in whack-a-mole* *bangs hammer on Sideswipe and Sunstreaker's helm*_  
_Sideswipe: Ow!_  
_Sunstreaker: Hey!_  
_Me: MWHAHAHAHAHAHA! *runs away* _  
_Sideswipe and Sunstreaker: Get back here!_  
_Me: Catch me if you can! *waves to reader* Tootles! Bye! Sayonara! Catch ya on the flipside! (I'm running out of good byes)_  
_Sideswipe and Sunstreaker: ELECTRIC STORM!_  
_Me: *winks* That's my name, don't wear it out!_

**Wheeliefan101: Welp, *sniff* There it is. The end of Double Trouble *wipes eyes***

**Random OC: I still can't believe you're ending it...I mean-wait. Are you crying?**

**Wheeliefan101: *voice cracks* No! Okay...maybe a little *blows nose in tissue***

**Random OC: Ewwww...**

**Wheeliefan101: Anyway, I hoped you liked it. How many of you were expecting the ending? Thanks for all the views, follows, favorite, and reviews. It's been awesome**

_**~Wheeliefan101, signing off~**_


	21. But wait, there's more!

**I can explain**

**No, really!**

**Okay...so I saw all the reviews about chapter 20. I was really shocked about how many of you wanted me to do a sequel! Thus, I have a given you a small "trailer" of what's to come**

**(WARNING: all this craziness will actually be in it, pinkie promise! 8D)**

Chapter 21: Wait, there's more!

_~Preview~_  
_Here's my teaser trailer for the my next fanfic!_  
_Read if you dare..._

A lone black and white figure sat between a desk, shadowed by the darkness. "So," he asked the transformer sitting in front of him, "what's your name?"  
A smirk flitted across the strangers features.  
_Are you ready for adventure?_  
"The name's Storm." The stranger's gaze lifted and two green optics blazed with intensity. "ELECTRIC Storm."  
_Then buckle up folks, this is one ride you'll never forget!_  
A red and white medic dragged Electric Storm, her screaming, "NOOOOOOO! I WANT TO LIIIIIIIIIIVE!"  
Her digits gripped the wall, scraping across it as she was drug away.  
_It has horror_  
"Electric Storm." The mech gave the femme a solemn stare. "You need glasses."  
She reeled back in horror and disgust. "NO!"  
_Suspense_  
Tammi glared at the suspect. "Alright, who are you? Talk! I SAID TALK!" The stereo offered no response. "I HAVE WAYS OF MAKING YOU TALK!"  
Nothing.  
"TALK!"  
No response.  
"Hm, this is going to be harder than I thought."  
_Adventure_  
Electric Storm raced through the base, screaming. Hot on her trail, Red alert chased her with a can of disinfectant spray, yelling, "COME BACK! I HAVE TO SANITIZE YOU!"  
_Tragedy_  
Broadside lifted the syringe high above himself. "Maybe if this turns me cooler, people can stand me!"  
As the syringe plunged down, Jazz and Electric Storm yelled/screamed, "NOOOOOOOO!"  
_Romance_  
Springer leaned in for a passionate kiss. As the two kissed passionately, Electric Storm spotted them and yelled, "Kissing! There is kissing going in here! K-I-S-S-I-N-G! Ew! Ew! KISSING!"  
_And humor_  
"HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA-"  
"Electric Storm, why are you laughing?"  
The femme nervously looked at the SIC. "Um...no reason..."  
When Prowl's gone...  
"HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!"  
_Read it!_  
_Because if you liked Double Trouble, you'll LOVE my newest fanfic, Rules to Remember: A guidebook for how NOT to die when living with the Autobots!_  
_Coming soon to a Fanfiction site near you... _


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